Realm of destiny

2008-07-27T16:50:00.003+08:00

I just realised, yea i juz did, tat no one understands me. Tats gd. N bad. Depending on who u r. If u r a criminal gd. If u r anybody else then forgt it. I doubt i will ever change. Too bad fer mi and all ard mi and all goin-to-be-ard-mi pple.

Am i tat gd in reading other pple's behaviour? N y do i always form perceptions of them based on tat? Wait tats normal rite. Forming perceptions of a person's character frm the way he/she behaves. No, actually not. Not whn u think u r perfect in doin so. I relly hope im nt perfect. In fact i hope i was lousy. How i wish i was dumber. How i wish i cldnt, and thus, wldnt, think so much.

Much s it is possible to quit smoking or drugs, the above second nature of myself seems alrdy a part of mi. Unseparable, conjoined, intertwined as one.

I need a time-out. A time-out from myself.

2008-07-24T22:26:00.002+08:00

Phew. Survived another day in camp. Was kinda busy but...manageable, at times. N i juz realised i lost one of my reports. Uh huh, im starting to screw things up aft taking over frm my u/s....lol. Tried to clear up all the mess bfore i left camp s tml i wldnt b in camp bt in east coast park. Cleared up most, of course, table manners say u shldnt wipe ur bowl of soup sparkling clean, so i had to leave some behind.

Just as i was about to leave camp the hottie, i mean horti gal (horticulturist gal) came into the office to giv mi sm documents. Looks like she's having an internal transfer in her company frm nxt mon. Aww....means tat i cant c her anymore boohoo. N surprising she's my age too. Then bfore she left my other female colleague 1 yr older said smth like its my last day to noe the horti gal liaoz. Walao. Then whn i wanted to leave camp it rained donkeys and monkeys zzz. I wanted to take a ride frm colleague but...he pangsei mi zzz. In the end my shoes n part of my jeans were wet by the time i reached the busstop. I cld feel the squishing sound of the drenched socks whnever i stepped down on my feet zzz.

Was a little late fer tuition. Holy cows. Whn i reached there, bfore i cld say "Hi Auntie", she picked up a cane n whacked twice on both my tutees each. Holy cows, or canes. Then i dun dare say anything else and went to start tuition. Upon reaching the room, the p5 guy started crying. N started cursing his mum abt being unfair and abusing him etc. Oh well, juz like who i was in the past. Consoled him and managed to get thru the tuition rather smoothly. Smoked him all the way. Nah, jk lar lol.

Ya tml east coast park fer mi. But its nt clz outing. Trying to c if my ankle will still b attached to my leg after 15km a nt. After tat take mc. Then rest of the day off. Lalala. Tml nite mayb stayingover, but wait cannot hav to brush teeth. So onli nite activities till pretty late then. Or pretty early lol.

2008-07-23T22:41:00.002+08:00

Went to wrk in the morn. Run cancelled due to dark clouds. Saved my ankle fer another day. Left aft lunch fer course. The course onli 3 pple -.- N i dun hav account to try out smmore cause nvr create. -.- Then aft course still go back camp. Dunnoe wat was i tinking. My onli reward was my chief clerk treating us to durians. Again haha. I ate a few. Omg the whole office stunk like there was a dead corpse in there sia. In the end we had to open the windows. Then went home.

In the bus ride home slept quite soundly. Too soundly. In the end i tink i knocked against the lady beside mi ard 5,6 times? Upon the sixth time then she gave mi a dagger-stare. N i was dam paiseh so i said sorry. Luckily my stop was near if nt i wld hav knocked against her smmore liaoz lol. Argh...my stomach hurts now....ouch....

Oo. I tink i shldnt giv advice to pple in matters which i myself suck at. Im so sry if i was the cause of any mishap. But i hav a feeling all is not lost yet. All the best my fren.

2008-07-22T23:03:00.002+08:00

Lol, my pri 2 tutee kip like to sa jiao wif mi whnever she wans her way. Tsktsk. At least she's getting more matured. I was a little mad at her fer nt doin her wrk and even worse kip gettin distracted by little stuff. The onli gd thing i can derive frm tat is i get paid fer doin nth, which if u look at it in another perspective is also bad. But i guess it prolly is the stress in camp which i face as well. Even during tuition i got a call frm my sgt. Nice. What i like abt her n her bro is that watever comments they make or say are perfectly innocently honest. Kids. Little angels (/devils) descending upon us from heaven. Ahh....

As my u/s ORD date gets closer, the more stuff i hav to close fer him and open fer myself. Onli spiritually (which i doubt so too) present in office, it is definitely a challenge to uphold the reputation he has built up fer the current post im holding. Tml wanted to take off fer the morn then go fer my course in the noon bt forgt to ask my dy head abt it. So im gonna b a gd boi n go frm wrk aft lunch tml. Darn tat means liferun tml. Darn tat means another chance to b a handicap again. Tink my dy head is starting to dislike mi. Oh well. Im gettin used to it anyway.

Personally devoured around 2 whole durians. Im nt relly a big fan of durians but once in a while, i cant relly stop whn i start, which is kinda bad. I often end up overstuffing myself like a pig and felt relly awful wif all the murky stuff churning in my stomach. Today was slightly beta. Haha. The onli thing i dun like is tat the smell of durian will stay on ur hands and ur breath will still stink the day after. Eww. Dun relly like tat kinda durian liaoz.

Thx bro fer organising the clz outing. (Although i also help a bit to giv ideas eh heh) But its kinda boring if like less than half of the clz turn out. Haiz. Ok i shall restrain my impeccable-trouble-courting mouth (or hands) frm saying (or typing) smth sacarstic. *slaps myself* Going to slp now. 2 days down. Im 2 yrs down. Not NS. Its my other liability, my life.

2008-07-21T20:32:00.000+08:00

Talk about monday blues. The morning run of 5km was a little torturing. I ran wif my ex-coursemates. They were rather fast, either that or i hadnt been running much, which i tink is a more truthful explanation. Luckily one of them cldnt catch up so i ran wif him to encourage him. After tat ran an extra rd rd the track. First time i saw my head in liferun lol. Argh! N my ankle! Seriously, i dunnoe wats wrong wif my left ankle since the last time i played soccer wif my old court shoes. Everytime it lands in tat inner position when you try to bend ur knee inwards, it hurts. A little aggravation towards tat position n it hurts. It hurts n it hurts n it hurts. U noe hw much i hate injuries. I tink i wld die living wif multiple long term injuries. Cant do this and that. Zzz. Horrible. Like totally (wif an aussie slang). hahah.

Next up, breakfast. I bought my usual mee cum egg cum hash brown cum, i mean combo, n a refreshing cup of ribena. Walking to my seat, my left hand holding the paper plate of my mee felt a little crack of the plate, then even before my super duper uber lightning quick reflexes could react at all, the mee met the floor quicker than the plate cld. Obviously the floor was starving.

I shrugged to myself, accepted my thanks frm the floor, then asked the uncle embarrassingly fer a broom n dustpan to clean up the leftovers. Then the uncle asked mi to take another plate. But of cos i rejected his offer cause it wasnt his fault tat the floor was hungry anyway. 5 mins ltr sipping my ribena and my fren eating his plate of mee, the uncle brought another plate to mi wif egg and hash brown. Argh. Y shld he pay fer feeding the floor. It shld hav been mi doin the honour. I tried to pay him but he swept it away wif such certainty tat i retracted my note realising tat i din wan to create a scene fer his gesture of goodwill in front of his store. Thanks uncle.

The rest of the day went wif a few more bumps here and there but nth new. Oya my sec clzmate who juz enlisted jio us go play bball tis sat. Ooo...haha i tink he muz b dam sian diao now. Im tired lar. Ytd slept after midnite. My fatty bro is sick. Lol. Tat asshole. Having fever. Ahh...prolly burning his fats away hahahaha. Get well soon! =)

2008-07-20T22:39:00.000+08:00

Wa my tutee's nt relly gd at fractions.

Watched dark knight. Was nice but draggy. Discussed abt the movie aft it. Tats abt it. Soon it will be another new and long week.

I never meant to hurt anyone frm the day I knew wat hurt was. Those who know mi knows. To all I did, I sincerely apologise. No hard feelings. Curse and swear at me if you have to. Or perhaps find a chance to know me better. The choice is yours.

2008-07-19T22:38:00.000+08:00

Swam. Din relly hav the drive to swim tat long. Motivated myself by following one rather bulky adult to and fro. After he stopped, or wat i suspect so if he din change his goggles, or weight, I swam another 2 lengths juz fer pleasure. It was then whn i truly felt poetry in motion in swimming. Well, robotic i wld admit, bt...lets juz say i din feel a bit tired during tat period. Reason i stopped was cause my ears were thirsty and were attempting to take a sip or two frm the pool.

Slacked the whole afternoon away. Then din go out afterall. Half-expected it anyways. Heh. In the end felt like an idiot changing frm going out clothes to home clothes. Eh wat. Wipe tat shock expressions of ur faces. Ya. My home clothes not = going out clothes alrdy. Upgrade liaoz zzz.

Tml morn gt tuition. Mayb joining frens at noon. All the way till nite. Dun go home so late hor. Monday hav to bk in one. Sianz. Run again. Die le lar ahm. 21km. Zzz. N im going fer this manpower course wif my 1st 3 mths buddy whn i was on course. Lol. Tat idiot. Wld b nice to c an old pal.

Oya juz realised smth. The 2 yrs in army almost reflects the path of life everyone takes. First u go undergo basic military training aka schooling and education. Then u go on course aka university. After u pass out aka graduate, you go to units to ply ur trade aka go out into the society and find a job. Then u understudy someone aka learning frm seniors to know more abt ur job scope n hw to do it well. After tat ur upperstudy ORDs aka u become independent and start to excel in wat u do (or try to). Also, you begin to start a family and ur career is on track. Then ur understudy comes aka ur children grows up and are old enuf to support you and you are on ur way to enjoying old age. Lastly, you ORD and c hw ur understudy has blossomed under ur guidance aka ur children start to hav their families and careers and u r one step away frm eternal peace. Ahhh... a birth of a new flame replacing the extinguished diminishing one. Welcome to the circle of life.

2008-07-19T08:53:00.000+08:00

Changed my shoe at queensway once again. Had to pay another 10 bucks cause i wore it alrdy. I no choice so pay lor since i wldnt wear the shoes if they werent changed cause they were simply too small fer mi.

My u/s has had his last day ytd alrdy. He says tat he coming back on mon to settle some stuff regarding my taking over frm him. Looks like its all on my own now. Now new funds have arrived. Stupid retarded superior now then put in. Kinda dumb to go thru all the trouble huh. Now i hav to modify my manual tracking again zzz. My u/s did a nice job teaching mi all he cld. I sincerely thank him fer tat n wish him all the best nxt time. Again. Ha. One more thing dam embarrassing. I wanted to find smone in camp then i accidentally called one of my frens due to same identity. Then i din realise until i put down the phone. Walau dam malu sia. -.-

Tonite goin to eat dinner outside. Actually wanted to watch movie bt nt free. Oh well. No more hellboy liaoz. Tml batman n dinner out. Cldnt make it fer ball cause gt tuition. Paiseh lar. Their CA one mth's time liaoz. Which means I might hav to teach fer onli a month more hahah. Eh bt hopefully not lar cause i dun tink i tat lousy lor zzz. Now, mayb swimming fer mi.

2008-07-15T21:01:00.000+08:00

Walao. Stupid shoes lar. I've forsaken them alrdy. I giv up. Let's juz take it i gambled my money away onli to lose it horribly. Stupid retarded mi sia. I suck at this kinda stuff. Dunno y but its true.

Today asked fer half day off frm dy head. Onli left office at 230 due to obvious reasons. Tired of wrk. I ORD mood liaoz even thou my u/s haven even left lol. I dun care. Its nt tat im lazy or wat. Its sm idiots which cld have expedited my finance transactions instead have deteriorated their progress. If the whole army was made up of NSFs it cld prolly survive. If onli regulars no way. Lets juz hope its the few black sheep huh.

Tml hafta chair meeting. Before tat meet dy head on retarded finance issues which i have no idea y im repeating myself like a broken kbox tv. Wat a disappointment. Sunday was such a climax. Now such stuff happen. Good things dun relly last after all. In my life tat is.

2008-07-14T22:41:00.000+08:00

First, lets talk about bad stuff first. My stupid shoe which i bought was too small fer mi -.- ARGH!!! Ok rewind. Sunday morn i happily embarked on once-per-mth soccer trip wif my frens at woodlands. When i first wore my shoes i was like "wa a bit tight sia", bt tot nth of it n started playin. After mayb 15 mins i felt blisters forming at the back of my feet. "Ok mayb juz my socks which were too low" i tot n continued. Another 15 mins n i cldnt take it alrdy. Even the outside of my last toe of my left foot was receiving the wrath of the new shoe. Fast forward. >>>>>Eh wait <<<<<>>>> Changed shoe then today tried to wear to camp. Wa cannot. Super tight still. Zzz. Nice shoes bt i cant wear T.T

Today at wrk the same crap u hear s usual. Blah blah blah. Pple nt doin wrk, i clearing up. Gettin more wrk. Did duty today. Tried to scram via the back gate aft duty bt was 5 mins late so had to go by the front gate which means no direct bus n more time wasted. Then the stupid bus almost missed my hand when i flagged fer it. Prolly cause the bus driver pitied mi fer wat i've been thru in the day then he stopped 10m after the busstop. Ok no interest to blog abt stupid stuff like wrk so lets go on the nice stuff!!!

Yesterday i realised i spent less than 2hrs at home frm the time i wake up...till i close my eyes....she's everywhr i go....psps become lyrics liaoz hahahahaha. Ok ya so onli 2 hrs at home fer sunday cool huh. After soccer n trip to queensway n toa payoh to buy book fer tutee (im a nice n caring tutor huh), i ploughed home at ard 430 in the afternoon. Asked my mum to prepare my dinner, ate at 5, finished up and packed my stuff n i went to play volleyball!!!! According to latest news there were onli 5 pple goin so if i went i cld make up the 6th so i went. Went city hall then made our way to smu by foot. Then i reached at 705 whn i n two frens arranged to meet at 7. Then my senior who is goin to smu exclaimed y i come so late. Then i asked y then he said cause gals training until 7 onli. Lol. Then on our way there by foot he said mayb they still bathing hhahahaha. We reached ard 710-715. Saw my seniors there 4 of them. Then i was wearing a jacket cause i was afraid of the cold in the train. Then one of them said wa play vball muz wear jacket ah. Then i say cause liddat then like those in the beach.ball.babes show ma lol. Walked past gymnasts practising into the hall. Wa...it was v long since i saw gals, i mean vball court indoors all set up. Well, there were gals bt they were packing up n leaving. Apparently one of them knew my senior so she pestered him to organise sm bbq thing lol. I was afraid tat my court shoe wld become pieces at first bt further trial n test made mi found out tat my court shoes prolly cld withstand one more session haha. Wa dam long nvr play. The first few i hit wif my hands made my hands looked like iodine cum starch mixture zzz. N it was super pain seriously. After tat it was alrite liaoz. Then spiking practise. Wa i din noe i gt improve frm last time lor. I onli knew i last time dam lousy considering my height. Now...its different heh. Anyway we played frenly match wif the smu team. The smu team was....at best mediocre. Our modified-cum-on-the-spot-formed team cld win the first set against them easily. I was the lousiest of them all lar -.- but it was fun. Then we were tied at 2 sets all. Then v late le so we played one last set. Fer the last set our senior who joined the smu team earlier came to join us n we played a 15-point set. Wa thruout the entire match i cld feel our sch spirit still burning inside us. The feeling tat there will always b smone to protect u, to help u in times whn u cnt cope wif the pressure etc. Tat was the team spirit i always liked since young. Ok nw i tell u MY highlights. haha. I rmbr one ball i dived to save wif one hand, then i rolled over n came back up on my feet. Wa i tink tat move dam cool. Shld hav recorded wif cam sia dam! Ok then 2 balls i spiked dam hard n nice. Siam the blockers hands n won the points. Even my seniors were a bit shocked lar lol. Now fer my bloopers. Walau whn my fren say i officer then my seniors were a bit disbelieving lor zzz. K lar hard to believe bt gimme a bit of credit can zzz. Fine nvm. Then i made a few blummers like nt saving the ball whn it landed ard my territory etc. Eh i in the team longest nvr play can. Cant help lor. Then one i cnfm rmbr. My fren helped mi set-up the ball fer a spike. But it was too far to my left n i was alrdy to the rite of the ball. Then i tried my best to reach fer the ball while saying "W....a....l....a....o..." thruout the entire projectile of the ball, n failed. Then my teammates were all rolling n laughing at mi lor. Zzz. Luckily smu nvr reacted haha. Ok lar actually a bit retarded lar. Tats y funny hahahaha. Wa then in the end hav to go liaoz cause 10 plus le. Today hav to wake up early. Haiz it was dam fun. I missed my teammates. I tink it was also fun cause of one of the senior who is super joker. Relly. He was making dam funny comments everytime. I still rmbr gt one point we rallied rather long. Then whn we lost we were quite sian diao. Then he panted, "wa im so glad the point is over". hahahah k lar it was dam funny at the point of time. The nite at smu was dam fun. Now its time to play beach vball hahahaha.

Its nice to be appreciated fer good deeds u hav done. It makes one more encouraged to do the same in the future. Unfortunately in reality its seldom the case. After last nite i realised it was relly nice to hav someone backing u all the way in watever u do. Although it was onli in the volleyball court tat i felt tat way ytd nite, i felt much more protected than whn i stepped out even thou i was playing wif pple whom i speak to less than the number of candles on my bdae cake. Its nice to hav someone supporting u, consoling u, lifting u up in times of need. N fer other occasions bask in happy times. Evidently its tough to find tat someone huh.

Honesty is the best policy no doubt. But unfortunately tat best is pretty much subjective. I guess its juz best to be who u r. Wearing a mask fer too long can actually spoil ur pretty face. You wldnt wan tat wld u?

2008-07-12T22:15:00.000+08:00

Forced myself to remain in my bed till 10. Went breakfast then used the com. Found out tat my com relly sucked to the core. Although its nt dual or quad core but the statement still stands. Now cannot even play games. Nice. Im amazed i cld even get to the windows page ha. Asked my dad to buy a new graphics card which i highly suspect the current one is severely decapitating my com.

After lunch made my way to queensway myself. Met a fren on the bus then missed my stop to change bus zzz. In the end had to walk 10 mins to go back to the previous busstop. Took the bus then decided to take a quick nap. Woke up ard thrice. Watever it is im juz thankful tat the last time i woke up the bus was abt to stop at the bus stop opposite queenway shopping centre. I still rmbr earlier in the wk whn i was on my way to NDC smone had to nudge mi to wake mi up whn i reached amk interchange lol.

Wow quite a lot of pple at queenway. N quite a lot of shops. My hunt fer the shoe which wld unite them(the sports which i wan to play wif it) all began wif my frens. My fren bought a jersey and another bought slippers (again) after ard 2 hours plus. I bought nothing zzz. I found the type of shoe i wanted but there was no size zzz. N it was like dam rare lar. Prolly now the brand umbro is extinct n no court shoes are low cutting enuf at the toes portion for you to play soccer. Argh. I even bought my old shoes to compare against my current limited options but sadly onli the ones wif nth of my size fitted. Ate macs to take a break. Got the stupid olympic cup then discussing slightly abt tuition experiences and whether macs is making higher or lower profits currently. I for one decided to exclude frm debates involving the former and drink my coke happily wif a straw. Ate alrdy then nearly 6. All of them had other apptmts so left on their separate ways leaving mi to hunt fer my shoe, again. After an inner-self-debate-cum-practical reasoning, I decided tat since i was goin to play soccer the most s compared to vball n table tennis, buying a pair of soccer shoes wld b the best bet. Vball or tt if nxt time i relly wan to play more often then i shall get another pair then. Anyway i suspect tat the reason y my INdoor court shoes spoilt so easily was prolly using it OUTdoors. I will giv it a proper burial fer serving mi so faithfully over the few years lol. Heh. Lame. -.-

Speaking of which, latest update is tat i might nt go play vball cause they hav enuf pple liaoz. I dun wan go there pick balls -.- Tml's soccer i will try out my shoes. Better dun spoil so fast or i will go find the shop owner fer revenge. Smhw, if i were to engage in all activities tml, i hav a bad feeling i might not b able to make it back home w/o limping. Last wk i limped home w/o vball fyi. O well, my premonitions dun always come true anyway. Or does it? It beta nt. Well, it beta.

2008-07-11T22:44:00.000+08:00

Today saw my u/s fer the first time in such a long time. Ok lar 3 days aint long but if u r in the army 3 days can seem like 33 days. Tat bugger zzz. ORD mood liaoz then so slack lol. He's been a great teacher to mi teaching mi all he cld in the past few mths i've been wif him. Although he will never read this, I wld like to giv a word of thanks to him. N wish him all the best in his future endeavours. So cliche huh. Eh but im serious lar zzz. Anyway today he took half day to go get his bank loan fer uni. I tink any company which has him will benefit lor. He has the patience, the calmness and most of the time rationalism to deal with anything which comes his way. Hey wait, y m i talking abt him like he's my dream gal zzz. Ok back to mi. Im more impt k. Did more amendments to the finance thing till the end of the day but i dunnoe if it will b settled yet. More pple hounding fer long overdue payments which i of course, cldnt hand over. Oya n i talked to this lady on the phone over business stuff then she seemed super enthu. Lol. We were talking abt our laundry contract ending then i asked her if we were goin to wash our own laundry if tat happens. Then she giggled haughtily. Haha tat cld hav easily ended up into a private chat but of cos i HAD the time to do so.

After wrk went yishun to look fer my multi purpose court shoe. One, i muz b able to use it to play volleyball indoor. Two, play soccer on hardcourt. And lastly, table tennis indoors. Hmm. My current shoe cld do it but yishun disappointed mi horribly -.- I went to 4 sports shops then either there was no stock or the cutting and design din suit my activities. Im starting to wonder if the current pair of shoe was a present frm santa in secondary sch fer being such a cute boy XD Wa......dam sad sia. My shoe spoilt till BER(beyond economical repair) liaoz. It was dam nice to wear lar.....Argh.... Hopefully tml queensway will not b a wasted trip. N the shoe better not b so ex.

Actually theres one of my jc's band performing duno at whr tonite. My frens say the gal's hot. Izzit sarah yap agn? Lame i dun even noe who is tat lar. Wat i miss out sia. Muz b nt outstanding enuf lar zzz. But i tink her voice quite nice whn she sings. Im falling........aslp.

Watched ball. beach. babes. (nt relly sure the order) Wa i tink the actors n actresses sm of them relly went to learn vball. Quite cool. The galfren of the male lead super clingy lor....dam cool sia the male lead. As in the way he say break up etc lol. N the stupid galfren still go threaten another gal who juz likes the male lead bt din even make a move. Idiot sia. Ahh....dreams. I dream. Taufik Batisah's winning song at Singapore Idol. I like tat song. Eh btw tat cinderella quite cute lor haha not like the one in the fairy tale. Or izzit the illustrator too lousy. Hahaha.

Tml goin queensway in the noon. Sunday dam fun. Morning soccer till lunch. Aft lunch go home rest. Then evening go smu play vball!!!! YES!!! My mum quite angry lor then nagged at mi abt my knee etc. Haiz, i mean zai. I also dunnoe lar. I relly wana play bt im also afraid my ankle or knee cant take it. I dun wan it ltr injured then more cham zzz. Knee guard i got. Ankle dun hav. Not s if it helps bt psychologically it does lor. Hope at the end of sunday i still can walk, normally. Zzz. Zzz. Zzz. But i love wkends XD

2008-07-10T21:52:00.000+08:00

Its kinda retarded if u wana present other pple's wrk s ur own. Firstly, its unethical and secondly u wun b able to truly noe the true meaning behind the wrk. The first im used to it but the second im especially tensed up abt it. Helping my dy head amend the finance reports time and again and time and again and time and again (yes tats ard the number of times or highly possibly even more, and yet more to come) is making mi sick to the core. Fine he may noe wat the higher authorities wan but even simple stuff such as adding a title like "Monthly breakdown of financial year Jul - Sep 08"even has to be done by mi. He admits tat his computer skills r zero but c'mon. Surely a sentence s the above wldnt b beyond ur ability??? Amend after amend after amend till i left office to go c the dentist. N he still wasnt satisfied. Or he tinks his superior wldnt b. So tml at 8 in the morn in his office i wld hav to go. How cosy. My apptmt wif the dentist was at 230. I left camp at 230. And it takes an hr juz to reach there. The numerous endless amendments coupled wif troublesome reservists were the main reasons y i "voluntarily" stayed back. I tink if it continues like this i may start to giv sacarstic remarks alrdy to the person involved lol. Once again i survived another day of pple hounding fer my blood. Either to get repairs done or to get their payments fer jobs done. Not s if i m the emperor. Go find smone else fer ur dragon blood zzz. Oya n i gt scolded by the reservist SO, i mean CO (the highest ranking guy) fer unbuttoning my shirt before i reached my bunk when i was on the flight of stairs up. Blah blah blah, rants of hw i shld b showing an example to others etc. I stopped my itchy mouth frm an impending argument and scurried away s i was alrdy late fer my dental apptmt. Left the disastrous place called camp n went fer my dental apptmt.

5 mins was all it took wif the dentist. 50 mins i took to get tat far. N another 15 mins to rd it all off. Rushed off fer my tuition aft tat. Reached 5 mins late. I've been on a roll. I've reached late fer my previous 3 apptmts wif them. Whoops haha.

My pri 2 tutee's relly gettin out of hand. Whn she relly doesnt wan to wrk she wun wrk. N i gave her a gd dressing-down (dun tink otherwise) whn she put her head on the table to ignore mi. Finally (and luckily), she began doin some of her wrk. A vast improvement s compared to a min ago. Prolly i tink either im gonna quit or get fired. Definitely the mother doesnt wan a tutor fer her son n another fer her daughter. N i realised taking care of a newborn is relly tough. The mother gave birth to one (2 mths back?) and i saw her feeding him milk. After feeding fer 1 min or less then he started puking it out. Then she has to repeat the same procedure all over agn. Omg it sure is tough huh. N her husband's onli back on wkends due to overseas commitment. She's one tough lady. Of course she has a maid to help her wif. But she has 4 kids too. Just like my family. I mean my mum.

Tml's friday. TGIF. I rmbred there was once this restaurant at douby gaunt whr the glasshse fish n co is now. It also sold steak etc. Wonder if anyone has any idea. Hav to buy my shoe either tml or sat. But i tink sat liaoz. I wan cheap n durable shoes leh. In my dreams rite i noe. Im dreaming.

2008-07-09T22:47:00.000+08:00

Woke up to the sound of thunder and overcast skies this morn. Yay means no life run so no nid fer mi to go c the medical officer n get an excuse frm running due to my idiotically weak ankle. My ankle's healing fine. Not the wolverine-speed which i hoped fer but at least its still rather kind to mi. Except whn i step on uneven ground which causes my ankle to bend in a specific manner which will cause mi pain, normal walking seems alrite. Now fer my rite leg...my rite knee hurts a little...n my rite toes seem a little stiff, two of them to b exact. Long story cut short, i still dun feel rite wif my left n rite knee.

Went to wrk today then realised gt sm stupid building inspection stuff. Took the whole day n it was walking frm building to building, up n down, inside out. Very tired. Tat speaks volumes abt my level fitness hmm. Came back to office at ard 5 then had to do more wrk fer my dy head. Apparently he is a greenhorn in handling finance issues in camp and i n my u/s have always been running the show fer him. Tml's he's seeing his head abt funds being stuck etc. Tats y i had to do ot today zzz. Hopefully the stupid funds are transferred over cause its kinda dumb if u onli giv bit by bit then wait fer the nxt quarter of the yr before u request more fer ad-hoc wrks. Wrong. Make tat retarded. My u/s ps mi sia. Today n tml mc. Fri half day. Song liaoz lor. Fri wanted to take off one to buy shoes bt cannnot cause afternoon gt sm meeting to attend on behalf on my head. Walau. Wrk wrk n more wrk. N more pple r breathing down my neck to get their building facilities such as storeroom doors repaired but the fact is the funds r stuck n theres nth i can do either. Theres onli 1 black bar on my shoulder dudes. Oh well.

Tml gonna b another day of inspection. But i dun care afternoon goin fer my last dental surgery follow-up. If everything's alrite i prolly can start blowing my nose n drinking frm a straw after abt slightly more than a month of absence. Im a good boy leh heh.

Oya think i prolly hafta buy a pair of court shoes if i wan to play soccer this sunday. Prolly goin to queensway first then yishun haha.

Misunderstandings occur whn parties involved do not know each other well. Tat is our case i guess. And it always will b.

2008-07-08T21:05:00.001+08:00

My day started pretty bad. Right whn the clock struck twelve. Or smtime bfore tat. Anyway i'll come to tat ltr.

Today at wrk i was the rubbish collector collecting every single piece of unwanted task into my ever expanding bin. Oh well. My u/s juz officially became my u/s. (Upper => Under) Zai. Now i'm officially dead. N he's gonna take nxt nxt wk overseas leave. Means theoratically, i'll onli c him till nxt wk. N did i mention he has ard....7 more offs to clear? Tat makes it even beta huh.

The treat at swensens was...ok to say at best. Ordered lamb chop. N its nt cause im a fan of the local movie comedy I Not Stupid. The meat was minimal, the soup of day bland, and the ice cream lacked the tinge of alcohol which i expected it to hav. During the meal we were discussing abt the various characters in our courses when we were still trainees, both mine and my u/s's. Haha had quite a few common insights there. And onli if i cld like do 2 degrees. One on chem eng and another on business banking n finance. Yea theres this double degree program i heard but hwever, one, business doesnt specialise tat far into banking n finance (i tink) and two, i aint gd enuf to qualify fer tat. Pop! goes my hopes lo.

My pri 2 tutee's gettin more n more daring. Nice. The onli thing i like abt her is tat she's still young n innocent and the funny questions she asks at times relly make mi smile to myself. Im nt a paedophile btw so dun get it wrong. She's relly ignorant of watever u say whn she doesnt want to hear but on the other if she has the passion n fire she will do her best in wat she does. Kids i guess huh.

Imagine tat u r chatting online wif smone. Ok regardless of who it is, after a few exchanges, the other party says something like "anyway its none of your concern". I dunnoe hw wld u feel but i certainly felt a tinge of disgust. Alrite mayb it depends on the context n the content. Something like whn someone asks u fer help then u listen intensely hoping u cld make a difference whn suddenly he/she says actually its juz a dream. Seriously i've nvr felt this feeling bfore until like...now? Actually i tink the fault lies wif mi. I tink im juz a big idiot trying to tink i can help every single soul in the world whom i come across whn in the end im doin myself a big disfavour, either feeling im useless tat i cldnt help or feeling guilty whn things dun turn out the way pple wan it to. Its true huh. Being too nice to everyone simply means being unkind to urself. How cool. Oh well dun mind my blabbering n rambling. Tis blog aint relly to advertise abt the good of the world n its inhabitants.

You made a right decision tat nite. Im glad i din dispute it. Sm things juz seem too incredulous for my puny brain to absorb. I admit you were insecure. You were insecure, simply because, u din noe mi at all. Tats y.

2008-07-07T22:12:00.000+08:00

Limp. Limp. Limp. And limping. Still. Felt like a silly old man who lost his walking stick or smth. Zzz. My ankle's pain on the left. On the right the whole foot seems lazy to bear the extra burden due to its weakened partner-in-crime and seems to b moaning thru the many nerves connecting it to my brain. Another night of rest and hopefully it will recover more, or even better fully.

Had duty today so reached home ard 9. Watched the new vball show accidentally whn switching chnls on the tv while i ate my dinner. Haiya missed the very first part lar. Im nt sure wat it showed but im pretty sure it showed a vball match or part thereof. Dam the entire show onli had like 2 scenes involving vball matches. The rest juz mainly concentrated on building up the plot and introducing futuristic relationships. Ahh...juz s i expected. A letdown show which features more of the babes than the ball.

My fren juz approached mi to help him source fer potential clients looking fer investment or savings plans. Oh well so sry dude i cant help u tat much. Either all the gals hate mi or the guys detest mi. Actually its both heh. So tat spells alot of my social contacts.

Tml treat at swensens fer lunch yay. Zai nid to bring clothes to wrk to change. Tml also hav to reach camp dam early cause gt duty. But at least theres half a day off wrk!! XD

2008-07-06T20:19:00.000+08:00

Holy macaronies! Serious. I had a relly relly relly relly relly (x as many as you can count) bad dream. I dreamt tat my mum (touch lotsa wood) passed (touched my head too juz in case) on. It was hell serious. I felt so empty inside mi like someone took my soul away onli leaving my corpse which could onli walk n talk devoid of feelings. It was a total nightmare. This relly proves hw much my mum means to mi despite some of the silly things she do to mi now and then. Im sure there are many more buggers out there in the world like my mum whom i cant live w/o fer sure. Nah u are not one so dun feel so gd. Heh. Joking lar. You are prolly one if u r reading this. Or smwhr there. Or smwat there. Watever. I hate tat dream. Tats the worst dream of my life. I woke up feeling super duper relieved. Holy smokes.

Woke up still thankfully breathing reality then went to eat breakfast before i went fer soccer at woodlands. Played fer ard 2 hrs etc wif frens n other strangers s well. Whoa, i tink im improving at soccer. At least now i try to tink of more than one way to play wif the ball whn i get it(if i get it). Kinda fun there. The sun's relly hot s usual. One of my fren din come cause he had rashes frm the clubbing last nite. Hmm 2 of them went double xo and drank then one of them came after 3 hrs of slp. The other had rashes prolly frm the alcohol. Well it beta be. The drinks' rather cheap at tat place. Feel like juz goin there to try out the atmosphere of wat it relly is to go clubbing. Actually clubbing = goin to clubs. Means i go clubbing bfore, onli nt at nite hahaha. Wait, i tink is half clubbing cause i juz went the outside w/o stepping in lol. Ouch i tink i hurt my ankle lar. Zzz. Dam pain now. I walk wif a limp now. Wa now im relly lame huh. Cldnt join my frens fer lunch cause had tuition so rushed back home to bathe n wash up. Met my other frens who juz ended their bball session haha so qiao. After tat went bathe then gobbled lunch then zao le. Wa had to limp all the way there. Sian diao. Die le lar i hate being partially paralysed. Argh!!! Nxt wk soccer i hope i can make it. Mayb my ankle's hurt due to the shoes i wear. I tink i can fight wif stephen chow in shaolin soccer fer the most rundown shoe liaoz.

Oya, one more thing! Chk out today's sunday plus. LOL my fans!!! Wearing shorts n slippers to orchard road!!! Cool huh haha. Aiya anyway i dress up beta than tat liaoz le lar. Some say its the company which decides their dressing. I tink fer mi its the company + the venue + my mood. Heh. N i nid to buy more berms to prepare fer uni. No way im goin there in long pants everyday. Im gonna set the fashion trend fer my fac man!!! Hhaahaha.

Today beta slp early. Quite tired almost whole day out sia. Tml still gt wrk. I tot suppose to hav youth day lor zzz. I onli 20 leh zzz. Youths onli stop at 18 meh. Still eatin my dinner aft one hour. Yea was busy eatin wang wang bfore dinner so ya. Tml's another wk. Zai. Nvm im gona shorten it wif offs XD

2008-07-05T23:21:00.000+08:00

Yay, juz nw went jogging. 12 rounds rd the track slowly but surely. Eh i dun wan to die so early chiong so fast fer wat sia. No money also zzz. Went out buy bubble tea n snacks. Walau tot can dun use straw to drink bubble tea but in the end left like a few mouths n all the pearls zzz. Hopefully aft this thurs wif my dream date wif the dentist he will allow mi to drink using a straw agn. Tml's sunday. Soccer tml YES! but at 9 at woodlands. dam far sia zzz. means i hav to wake up at 730 zz. oh well. my fingers still hurt frm bowling ytd. Eh i tink i noe hw to bowl liaoz. Straighten hand till contact between ball n floor then can bend liaoz. Zzz. Prolly another 42 frames juz to try it out, and MAYBE succeeding. Juz nw after jogging tried to do one pull up. Then cant even do cause my chest dam suan. Wa dunnoe wat happened man. Mayb going thru puberty part 2. Zzz. Prolly cause of ytd's exercise in camp.

I beta slp early tonite. Ok not very early now but it shall do. Time fer my fitness sleep liaoz....

2008-07-05T13:35:00.000+08:00

Yoyoyo! Yalar im nt at sentosa today cause no one interested to go tat far zzz. Anyway i guess the event's prolly nt very entertaining unless u relly wana go c the actresses and get their autographs n wat hav u. I think the show is juz another rip-off of the previous show The Champion which features swimming instead of volleyball. Both use pretty actresses s their main attraction(which is quite lame since they cant relly swim or play tat well in real life, i tink), and both feature them in skimpy outfits s well. In case u do not noe gals playin vball in real life competition will wear wat will seem like a swimming trunk s their btm n a shirt. So there. I tink its juz gonna raise the awareness of vball s a sport (which a lot of babes play, which is onli relatively true s wif other sports), other than tat prolly relationships stuff which chnl 8 is famous fer. Anyway famous does not equate to good.

Ytd went out aft wrk. Stupid nvr tell mi goin yishun earlier if i knew i prolly wld hav brought my clothes n went straight after wrk zz. Reached there ard 730 then sm sale caught my eye selling berms n shirts. But the patterns din seem nice. Onli beach shorts there. Din bother to c the shirts aft tat. Went to eat then went bowling. Walau dam long lar the wait dunnoe y so many pple bowl nowadays. Ok its juz a friday nite nth else. Waited ard 10 plus then they gave us a lane. Then the lane so noob kip stucking n hanging. Zzz. Played 2 games then zao alrdy cause at tat time 1130 le. Wat does this means? Cabbing home zzz. Walao i hate bowling lar. Ok actually i dun juz tat im frustrated i cannot get my ball to travel the lane the manner i imagine it to. Btw, im nt trying to do sm shaolin soccer or kungfu dunk stunt. Tried it fer 2 games and failed. Perhaps onli 2 balls satisfied myself haha. Out of....42 tries? Nvm nxt time i bowl i tink i go alone bowl. Wa but then quite ex sia. Tsktsk one game close to 4....beta limit myself n nt get too addicted.... And....the lane beside gt 2 couples i tink. Then the guys were wearing handguards n were quite pro lar. Then i tink bfore we started i chose my ball's weight n decided on an 8 pounder. Then the 2 guys were like pointing to the ball n laughing. Zzz. Then my frens called it a sissy ball zzz. I dun care in the end i tried the 12 pound din like it n reverted back to the 8 pounder. Heh. Anyway i saw another gal in another lane using the 8 pounder s well. Hahaha. Went fer prata then went home. Cabbed home then sleep le.

Actually wanted to go swimming today but woke up ard 930. Quite late le. But later definitely goin to run sia. I tink hafta clear my IPPT soon le. Sianz. How m i to run below 945 fer 2.4 run zzz. Dun feel like leh hahah. But i can lar zzz. Oh well. Muz run more liaoz liddat. Sianz din noe i hav to run 21km fer ahm man. Got scammed liaoz. Zzz. Ytd in camp onli run 2.8km. haha no worries, its juz the difference of a decimal point huh?

2008-07-03T23:23:00.000+08:00

Hmm...Wanted was alrite. Despite all the hype and hoo-hah, I still couldnt find enuf to register it one of the best movies i've seen. Tat's including the fact tat i dun c many too. But i like the ending. Kinda cool.

Back to wrk was alrite. Time took a little too long fer my liking to pass. Looks like i aint gonna join the gaming competition after all. Haiz. Was so looking forward to it lar. Anyway ali, thx fer the offer on bowling n cycling. I tink i'll prolly make a solo trip one of these days if im relly tat desperate. Till then mayb i'll call sm guys along too. Today, again i n my upperstudy n our fren received praise frm our dy head abt our excellent performance in SAF day. "The lieutenants were all very good!" As quoted frm him. Gaaa...it was kinda easy actually. Im good huh. Heh. Yay then nxt tue goin swensens fer lunch. And of cos 3 days off. hahah. So many days off also dunnoe wat to do sia lol. Wa i tink uni orientation camps will b quite fun....cant wait fer mine...hope my organisers rock big time!! My u/s ORD mood le. Sianz. Now onli left mi to absorb all the rubbish pple throw at mi. At least he dun throw mi in the lurch n go on off or leave. At least he helps a little anyway.

ONE more thing. My com is screwed up. If my senses serve mi well, its the lousy built-in graphics card tat is causing the problems. Nice. Just like my life previously, screwed up. (I nearly wanted to say "previous life" instead of "life previously" lol) At least now, im more or less settled, i tink. I better be huh.

2008-07-03T00:52:00.000+08:00

Hmm....my pri 2 tutee's turning out to b quite a handful. Tats bad. Tml's wrk. Tat's nt gd either. I feel like joining sm amateurish gaming competition wif my frens. Tat cld b exciting. Im nt taking off tml. Saving it fer another day. I wan to play bowling n go cycling. I also wan go sentosa tis sat to c the new program event thing. And also play vball. So many things. But no one wans to go boohoo!

2008-07-02T11:18:00.000+08:00

Im on off. As of now. No calls frm office(yet), onli msgs frm an idiotic colleague whos like 40 plus or 30 plus. Ytd was SAF day proper. And fer our reception portion it was a resounding success. The onli complaints i heard abt was tat the prawns were not deshelled and that there was not enuf napkins to go ard all of which can prolly b dismissed s insignificant minor grunts from unsatisfied individuals. First the prawns were cereal prawns and who exactly cooks cereal prawns deshelled? Nxt i was one of the last to try the food there and i cld easily find a napkin in sight. Our head said tat CDF commented that they wanted us to do the 2009 SAF day s well so that they din nid to vet. Prolly a compliment, a very good one. Dam, i hear my hp ringing....Ok phew nth big. Onli sm idiots coming to chk the IDS system. As i was saying our reception portion was perfect, quoting frm wat our head said anyway. And he seemed like he was over 10 moons. After we were dismissed at ard 11 plus at nite, i volunteered to go back camp wif sm of the men to unload the stores. And 2 idiots were to sneak into the swimming pool n dumped themselves into the pool in boxers. -.- I and another guy went to help the rest unload stores. Soon done then went home. Prolly reached home at ard 12 plus close to 1.

Argh dam my bro went to reformat the com. Then i had to reinstall everything agn - sp2, antivirus, games etc. Walau then now the auto-restart syndrome of my com seems to be out of control. Oh well. Mayb its time to get a new com. So boring at home. I tink i twisted my back or smth. Whnever i try to twist my body it will hurt a little. Think muz b all the physical wrk i put in fer SAF day zz. Oya then my dy head praised tat i did a gd job. Actually i reverted back to my role of a cue master in the end s my head wasnt confident wif my fren who juz came back frm course to join us. Frm the actually event onwards we din hear his voice anymore and it was all up to us. Aiya actually quite easy one lar. Of course i did it seamlessly. We'll prolly get maybe 2 or 3 more days off aft this s our reward. Rmbr abt mi saying wat i was too nice? Being too gentlemanly doesnt help either. Or rather trying to b. Ha, im afraid tats the horrible but realistic truth.

2008-06-30T23:53:00.001+08:00

WaAaAaAa...... my com exploded!!! ZZZ. Now using my bro's com. Lousier but oh well still functional at least. My com.... T.T die le lar nid to buy another one liaoz. Who will pay? I duno dun ask.

Juz came back from SAFTI after having supper at a nearby place wif colleagues. Wa...super long day. A day whr my boss was screwed terribly by his boss. oh well. I guess tats when rank n appointment talks. I was also quite lucky. Now im no longer the cuemaster but my head's runner. So tat means i muz do his cues all by heart w onli him gesturing or signalling to mi. So tat means i will always b ard 10metres of his radius tog wif mr. president. o.0 Ok tats gonna b boring n tat means i will hav more chances to screw up the entire post parade reception portion. Cool. Caught up wif 2 of my course mates during the day. haha quite interesting to find out wat they've been up to in their love lives. I onli noe tat pple's characters cannot b matched by their looks haha. It seems tat i n one of them face the same problems but its definitely more obvious who is the more successful one so far in terms of relationship. N its nt mi btw. Mine? A thing of the past and quite definitely not a thing of the near future unless lady luck shines mr.cupid shoots, accurately.

Whoa, im tired. Tml's the big day. Mind i said "the" instead of "my". Not tat i dun care abt my head's career bt dun worry boss, i'll do the job. Clean n sweet. Alrite fatigue's setting in. I've gotta finish up a soup n grapes bfore i knock out. Feed mi pls someone -.-

2008-06-29T21:30:00.000+08:00

Argh. I type this post in the hope tat it will b published. And if worse comes to worst probably the last fer a long time to come. Actually i hav other coms haha so nvm. But hey its like the others r cmi ones. This com can play games but the internet explorer is screwed up. Everytime i click on ie then they will prompt mi to dl sm stupid antivirus cause there is trojan horse detected then i click no they will link mi to the stupid ie antivirus website. This happens everytime i try to go to some address. Argh all because my itchy fingers clicked on they "install" button whn one website prompted mi to install some stuff. Btw the website is nt unclean. -.-

Oh well this morn went swimming wif fren. Actually is i swam alone then he came like half an hour ltr zzz. Walau the pool so squeezy lor onli allowed 2 lanes fer public usage and the rest were allocated fer training purposes. Somemore the 2 lanes gt like a circle movement to adhere to so tat pple wun clog up the 2 lanes. ZZZ. Luckily i went early and there werent many pple. Swam quite a lot. Mayb 10 laps altogether? Of cos nt continuous. Onli mayb 6 laps continuous. Freestyle. Nice. Wa then saw a few prolly teens in their early stages having swimming lessons. They seemed to be able to swim so effortlessly it seemed s thou they were walking in water. Ok bad analogy but u get wat i mean. N i tink gals who swim will hav nice figures. 2 gals there swam quite stylishly. But i guess its cause they were swimming freestyle -.- After tat went to play basketball at nearby jc. Wa the sun was mercilessly burning i felt s thou i was the cheese in the pizza hut oven. Yes, melting too. My vision was terribly blurred after i swam prolly due mi nt using goggles to swim (cause i cant afford one) and no thanks to the glaring uv-coated sunrays. It was blurred like....i juz cldnt c properly n it was a terrible feeling. I tot i was goin to lose my vision. It continued fer a few hrs even s we went fer lunch aft tat. Came home also liddat. Wa sian diao. Now i tink beta. Tml hopefully perfectly normal. Die le lar hope my mum bought insurance fer partial blindness. Ok i m 99.9% sure my mum will slap mi if she reads the previous sentence. Oya no female hav ever slapped mi bfore cept my mum, s in my face, so tats a pretty gd record i wld like to keep. Tml back to wrk. Goin to SAFTI fer prep fer tue which is SAF day. Faster finish lar i very tired of it le. Tue goin to wear new uniform there, wif a tie n stuff. N its nt cool. Very hot if u ask mi since its long sleeve. Watched chronicles of narnia. Chey seemed like another golden compass. Ok lar. so-so. I so wana watch get smart. N its nt cause of the title fyi. Cant wait fer wed off. Stupid com!!!! ZZZZZZ...........

2008-06-28T23:51:00.000+08:00

Today morn woke up at 10. Wa dam late. Then ard 1230 went to collect insurance quotation frm fren. He goin sentosa so i met him at srgn mrt. Haiya feel bad cause in the mum din wan to buy insurance make him waste his time a bit bu hao yi si. Sry dude. Mayb whn im wrking le then i approach u? haha. Tat's if i hav no debts to repay. Walao then my fren say nxt wk he goin play beach vball wif jade seah!!! OMG. Hmm, its abt the new show comin up on either chnl 8 or chnl u the one abt beach vball one. I onli noe the english translation is beach babes. Zzz. Onli 8 teams were chosen to play wif her n prolly some other celebrities i tink. Walao!!! I wan to go sentosa n play vball lar!!! Sianz. Afternoon then went out wif fren. Chatted and shopped fer 2 hrs? Then bought bubble tea. Then i told my fren nt to buy frm one shop then he din hear n go buy in the end cost 30 cents more. I went to e other shop to buy cause i cannot drink wif straw but in the end still sealed the cup n gimme straw. Wat was amusing was prolly i nearly walked away w/o paying fer the drink. So paiseh lar. Then the two aunties say kao dao them then forgt to pay. -.- zzz lame. Then still teased mi say wat my ears turned red. Eh tats a healthy sign to say tat i exercise a lot k. (As if lol) Then my fren juz laughed. Ahhhh....the conversation was interesting....

The feeling of falling in love is so beautiful. Even if its not u u still feel happy fer whoever it is. "Freshness breeds excitement, familarity breeds comfort." Well said old fren. Whereas the former allows more freedom, perhaps the latter will truly make one feel at ease and loved. A mix of both would be perfect. Perfectly perfect. Wun you agree huh?

2008-06-27T23:53:00.000+08:00

Off today. Actually not relly considering the number of calls i get frm my hp from office nos. Cept tat i aint in camp physically. Hav to tie up a number of loose ends since its the end of the wk sianz. Worst of all, my dy head was "disappointed" wif mi n the head pa fer taking off on a day whr much wrk n prep had to b done fer the upcoming SAF day on tue. Oh well. I guess today's juz another of his pms-ing days. Juz gotta gt used to him my u/s said. Today slacked at home then went tuition at void deck. Wa v distracting cannot liaoz nxt time muz b in a hse. Then the boy headache, so i let him off earlier 5 mins. Then i asked him wat he tot of mi then he say not bad (usually wat pple will say so as not to hurt ur feelings), then he said sometimes slack. Lol. Oh well. Looks like my tuition career is off to a bad start. Treated him to ice-cream aft clz and went home le.

Watched the 9 o'clock show also. Was abt relationships and stuff. Then one of the female leads was like considering if marrying had to be compulsory to show tat she loved her bf. She was like gettin the pre-marital blues n stuff and being pessi abt the future whether her marriage after she married will nt take a turn fer the worse like sm of the live examples she had seen. The responsibilities and suddenness proved too much fer her to handle and she became a runaway bride, ending tonite's episode. Interesting. Indeed.

2008-06-27T00:53:00.000+08:00

Off tml. Make it today. Long wkend fer once. But no programs. Clz gathering cancelled. Maybe goin out tml bt doubt so. Boring.

2008-06-25T22:27:00.000+08:00

Monday nite rushed out bishan fer dinner wif frens. Then went macs fer a little chat. Then dunnoe hw we talked till fairytales and young children's stories. Omg it seems like i've lost half my childhood or simply haven gone thru it yet -.-

Tue vetting by Mr. 3-star general. I did my part smooth n cool and we were rewarded wif some food, President's standard. Alrite actually it was food tasting fer CDF bt it was catered fer 50 pax so yea I kinda sqeezed myself into the 50. Oooo, there was chocolate fountain there too...Omg seems like mini Willy Wonka was there himself haha. Then went off at 8 plus close to nine and reached home at nine plus. Phew, at last a full day of rehearsals ended well whn it was nided most.

Today went fer the last day of table tennis comp. Zzz din get to play made mi waste my time travelling. Wa heard a lot of my frens clzmates or pple i noe gettin overseas scholarships. Heard one abt firefly one. Dam. They let mi hav a smell of it a yr ago. But onli juz tat. I can onli blame myself fer being unfocused and distracted. Prolly goin to go down s the biggest regret of my life. Wats past is past i admit i aint a born scholar anyway. Then went home aft tat v song off the rest of the day. Went fer tuition then my tutee said i was slacking. Haha ok lar i wun b the nxt time rd k? I dun wan to get fired even bfore they receive their first test results -.- Tml back to wrk. Hopefully friday i can claim my off. Then long wkend haha. But aft tat SAF day proper. Omg Mr. President. Pls leave mi sm food aft u leave k? Heh.

2008-06-22T22:19:00.000+08:00

Today slept till ard 9 then woke up. Wow tink it rained thru the nite cause i woke up feeling cold. Actually wanted to go queensway wif frens prolly to get my shoe. Bt in the end cause had to go tuition so asked them to postpone afterall. Noon went fer tuiton. First time i saw their dad. Then usual stuff. Went home. Played some computer games. And soon it will be the dreaded monday. Oh well. Used to it. Anyway kungfu panda is quite nice. Another....nice action cartoon i guess. Back to wrk. Zzz. im gettin bored of blogging. Perhaps i shld cut down the frequency.

2008-06-22T00:38:00.000+08:00

Today. Erm...slept until v shuang. 9 plus then woke up. Then ard 12 left hse went out wif frens. Gt my senior there also. Then he ORD-ed alrdy and was currently wrking part time issurance agent then he intro-ed us abt policies etc. Wa actually the financial world is rather complex after all. What unit trusts, hedge funds, depreciating assets and diverse investments....after his presentation i felt s thou i juz went fer a crash course on finance. Based on wat he said i suddenly realised tat being a financial planner sure has very great potential in the society in future. No wonder my dad wanted mi to study banking and finance zzz. Oh well. U onli can choose one to study anyway in uni. Catched up a lot on old times. Then aft tat went on our own separate ways. Went home then prepared to go fer hsewarming at my uncle's hse. Oh well, had a big tiff wif my parents there. Call mi a problem kid. Either im a gangster wannabe or...watever. Shallnt mention bad stuff. Did my multiplication table fer my tutee tml. Found out abt punctuation fer dialogues frm the net. Complained to my cousin hw angry i was wif my family and he kinda eased my anger and consoled mi. Lol. Btw he's 2 yrs my junior. Tml theres onli tuition in the afternoon. Argh. My last day to slp late fer the week. Then its full steam ahead agn. O yea, seems like its the As all over agn....

2008-06-20T22:52:00.000+08:00

Today was a very gd break frm wrk. Anyway lets start wif ytd first. Ytd went to camp and amended all the stuff nided fer today's rehearsal. Since i was unable to make it, briefed my clerk abt wat was my role approx. and frm his ability he probably cld figure out the rest. Then stayed up till ard 9 plus before goin home. Tricked the duty clerk into making him think tat i was goin to make him stay in wif mi. N he was quite happy whn i said so haha. Kinda bad huh mi but oh well, cant resist a little joke here n there s long s it doesnt blow pple up. He even din mind to walk wif mi over to another blk to hand over keys haha. Guess it prolly he cldnt mind it given the fact tat he was my duty clerk but hopefully nt the case. Reached hm at 945? Then bathed blogged n slept.

Today morn rushed to camp to issue arms then went off to kallang fer table tennis competition at the new sun sports club. Wa...very long nvr play table tennis competitions le. I played onli one doubles today although there were 2 matches. Given the fact tat i was dam busy wif SAF day and cldnt train much i din relly hav the confidence to ask my captain to put mi to play. In the end, I won my match cause the opponents' standard simply wasn't there and my team won overall. Fer the other match lost 2-3. Zzz....no more chance to qualify into semis le. And no more offs tats the worst!!! Wa bt reached there alrdy saw 2 pri sch frens. One played table tennis all his life. Said hi to mi. Another asked if i rmbred him n i called him by his name immed. Then we made a few exchanges wif ea other the 3 of us n he said i still hadn't changed since pri sch, the manner at which i talked. Lol. Old habits die hard huh. Then saw a lot of my jc team mates playing fer different formations. Lol prolly could have a table tennis gathering there fer my jc le haha. Rather nice to relieve the old times. My doubles partner in jc was also there lol. Still s shole s ever haha. Haiya the 2-3 act i wanted to play the last singles. Either mi or my ex-captain. Then he played in the end cause i din relly hav the confidence to tell my captain to put mi since my serve was rather rusty given my minimal amount of training due to wrk commitments. Zai zai zai. Then he lost 2-3 n the team lost 2-3. Wasnt easy i knew. But, i stood a chance of doin one better anyway huh. *wink* Oh well. I tink i will deteriorate in everything s i grow up. Last time i topped my clz n was even poached to go cat high juz to play table tennis fer the school. Now? Lol. Juz the opposite. Anyway saw jason ho e national paddler there n a few other big names in the table tennis fratenity. Aiya, seen jason ho since i was in pri sch haha. So no surprise. Hope nxt wed fer the last game i will b able to play.

Tml lunch gg out wif frens. Dinner at uncle's hse fer housewarming. Sunday noon tuition. Alrite. At least i dun hav to wake up early tml huh. Oya tuition gotta prepare sm stuff. Muz rmbr sia. Anyway gt another tuition offer. Rejected it cause i din wana over commit myself. Pri 4 math n sci. 220 per month. beta price than wat i hav nw but oh well im nt complaining. Think im prolly goin to slp aft this. My rite hand n leg r suan and its nt the normal suan type. Its the pain n suan type. Ok anyway its nt nice k. Went to central buy sm food stuff. Tidbits to b exact. Scolded by my mum fer eating junk food. But kinda wan smth to munch on so tat i will nt b so bored. Ok tired le lar. Nxt tue Chief of Defence Force vetting. May he be a kind soul n approve our proceedings haha. Watever it is, its the wkends first. Chill out!!!

2008-06-19T22:48:00.000+08:00

Whoa, im rather tired. Wrong, make that very. To bed, my faithful companion.

Anyway here's a joke frm a lifeguard tat livened mi up a little one late night wrking .

People who run in front of the car will be tired.
People who run behind though, get exhausted.

o.0

2008-06-18T23:08:00.000+08:00

Whoa, im dead beat. Came home ard 9 plus frm SAFTI prolly lucky tat i hitched a ride frm a lifeguard. Squeezed a while wif 6 in the car so yea i was the extra one who joined in the last haha. Realised tat my DY head stayed ard bishan st 11 oooo....so near nia...luckily he seldom brings in wrk aft wrking hrs if nt i tink i almost everytime hav to wrk ot liaoz zzz. Wa today at SAFTI set up deco fer the dining hall, then prepared fer vetting. Tink we were dam raw lar hopefully we become better, MUCH better by next vetting by Chief of Defence Force. Then witnessed the 5 men Music and Drama Company frm SAF ensemble played a few songs. 3 violins, mini ones ( i dunnoe their proper names -.-), 1 keyboardist ( i tink tats wat hes called) and 1 guitarist. Wa, looks dam pro lar they all, eh act nt but i was impressed. N my heart melted at their music....awww....wanted to learn some musical instrument fer awhile but oh well din hav the time n prolly nvr gonna hav. I dun hav the musical talent either so there. I juz realised tat being the cuemaster fer my department fer the post parade reception portion is actually quite a heavy responsibility. Being tasked to cue the MCs and everyone on board, lol, i could very well b the person to cause Mr. President to do the wrong stuff at the wrong times. Oh well, i'll try my best anyway. Actually there ought to b another rehearsal this friday but i told my Head tat i had table tennis comp. Wooo...i was surprised he was willing to let mi off fer it. Im quite excited abt it haha. Very long nvr play le but i doubt i will hav to chance to play given my lack of training and exposure due to committments fer SAF day. Tml will clear up my stuff then friday go off to play. Sianz duty tml agn. I dunnoe y its so sucky. No choice anyway. I hope tml will b fun. Will b bringing my pt attire n bat to camp if i rmbr juz in case they decide to train. Not tat i get a chance to get sm training time but u nvr noe. Ok lets say i wun hav a chance to k. So scrap tat. K lar 1130 alrdy quite tired le. Did i say this month i was goin to b busy? I guess i got more than i bargained fer huh.

2008-06-17T21:50:00.000+08:00

More often than not, due to some pple's negligence or failure to fulfill their duties, others hav to suffer as a result so as to cover up for wat is left undone. That is the reason y im nt goin to b home at all fer the nxt 20 hrs at least. No matter hw hard u wrk, or hard u try, things will definitely get stuck smwhr along the chain of processes. This is one of the few times when i get so pissed that i begin to use vulgarities. Forgt it, wats done is done.

Back to wrk today and found a not so huge wrkload waiting fer mi to clear but at least it wasnt s huge s last time. It was kinda manageable of cos wif my u/s helping mi out wif sm stuff. In the afternoon at ard 2, then he went to SAFTI to help out. Then since his hse was juz 4 stops frm SAFTI, he decided to go home str8 frm there even wif his bag still in his office. In the end i hav to clear up watever mess he left behind n hav to take care of sm of his stuff to bring fer tml's vetting such as laptop etc. Nvm. Im cool.

Depending on whr u r, smtimes or rather everytime, being Mr. Nice guy will kill u. Always promising others to lend a helping hand will land u in more mess than actually gettin back the recognition or even a word of thanks which they owe u. Nvm nvm. I swear i will nvr ever put in my max effort while wrking here. Onli the bare minimum, or wat i deem suitable. After all, it never pays. It doesn't.

2008-06-16T23:44:00.000+08:00

Today went SAFTI. Wa witnessed a little prelude of wat was to come the actual including the parade. Not bad the parade cept i tink they were still a little raw but no worries given tat they still hav 2 wks of practise to go. Woo...then i saw the best unit competition winners frm commandoes. All red berets....haha. Then went to meet up wif my course mate who was instructor at OCS. Nxt wk gettin their new batch of cadets alrdy. haha. No more slacking. Then saw my sch's prom king eating lunch, newly commissioned. Ooo...NDU officer. Wicked sick lol.

Wa it seems my tutee's mum is rather kind to mi. Anywhere she can accomodate mi she wld. Tats nice. She's a mother of 4 juz like my mum. 2 guys 2 gals. Balance mix haha. Age gap between oldest n youngest is 11 yrs, 1 more than my family. Today went fer yet another session and it was alrite. Then the guy asked mi if i had more students n i replied no. Then i asked him y then he said cause i looked like i had. And i was a nice teacher. Lol. Sweet talker sia he. Anyway i noe myself. I tend to set too high expectations smtimes. Oh ya did i mention his mum wanted him to skip Os n go fer the zhi tong che ting? I'll try my best if i last tat long haha. Perhaps the hope of wanting him to succeed whr i failed and become a better student than mi will drive mi on to teach him well.

Back to wrk tml. -.-

2008-06-15T22:39:00.000+08:00

Wa very tired le after a whole day out. First went to woodlands play soccer. First to reach there agn zzz n i was juz nice on time. Finally set of to the court n reached at ten. No one to play wif cept one other guy. Played fer ard 2 hrs. Quite tired liaoz. Then went to eat lunch. Was dam hungry lar. Ate one bowl of laksa. Then ate half more bowl of ban mian. Then still hungry zz. But since the rest wanted to go off i dun wan eat liaoz. Then went sg pools since 2 of them wanted to bet. Lol had a tinge of curiosity to giv it a try bt given my luck i gave it a miss. Wa another of my fren also broke up lar. Then his camp 3 more broke up. Zzz. Tink he had a gd gf lar. Is he wanted to giv up onli. Wad a waste.

AFter tat went home liaoz fer the rest. I had to join my fam, frens n cousin at east coast. Wa frm one end of the island to another sia. Long long way. Reached there ard 4 in the noon. A lot of pple tsktsk. Father's Day, expected thou. Then guessed wat, they were playing soccer whn i reached. N ya the stupid 401 take dam long to wait lar. 30 mins if im nt wrong. ZZZ. So play soccer, again lor. Quite fun lar onli prob is tat i played barefooted in the end gt a few bruises here and there. Then ltr went home to take a bath. Then went to hav dinner. I also quite hungry. Ate ma you ji then 3 quarter bowl of ban mian. Ban mian agn cause i nvr finish the other half in the afternoon muz make up lol. Anyway i tink i gettin skinnier lar. Every gal wld definitely go fer my build now. Slim n tall. But definitely none of the guys heh. Actually they wanted to play lan ltr but either the shops were closed or closed down. Lol i was act quite tired to play s well anyway. Then came home watched incredible tales then this then prolly goin to slp aft this. Tml still hav to go SAFTI. Sian.

I guess i finally realised in life there is nth u can pine fer fer life. Some stuff may come whn u least expect it. Such are the nice surprises in life. Fer others, it cld b best if they prolly nvr existed at all...

2008-06-14T23:02:00.000+08:00

Yawnz. Today was a boring day. Did nth the whole day. Morn fren asked mi go swimming then ltr i say can le then he say he gt cold zzz. Afternoon took an hr nap then went jogging at ard 4 at the college near my hse. Almost no one there. A few children here n there. A few adults. A few students. Ran 6 rounds then went back. Considering its the first time im running in mayb ard 2 mths? Its prolly rather encouraging. Went back joked wif my mum abt mi nearly being the 3rd guy to go on the papers fer mishap n nearly gt a slap. zzz. Whr's the sense of humour huh. At nite went to central walk walk. Bought a bit of stuff then went home alrdy.

Hmm...wat a gd life diary this blog wld b fer mi. Blogger.com beta nt crash or watever. N yea read a bk frm my bro's camp abt self-confidence. My mum introed mi one. Not s if im nt confident abt myself zzz. Rmbred esp one. "Count the positive things only, not the negative ones." So cliche. Not s if i nvr liddat zzz. Haha anyway, din relly write much abt the past wk or so. Wed stayed in camp. Stupid pple who wanted to make the security passes came onli at 9 plus such tat i n my fren tot they went mambo or smth. Watched Sarah Connor. Not bad quite nice. Lol the mum's another Angelina Jolie. Took a little nap then woke up n realised 11 le. zzz. No more hopes of gg home tat nite alrdy. 1230 they ended printing. Went online a while but kinda pointless so went slp le. First we slept on the floor in the conference rm. Then too cold. Then i went sofa haha.

Thurs another normal day. Left early fer dental then met my fren who POP-ed frm tekong on my way there. Said he knew abt the guy frm tekong. Supposedly frm K coy. Tsktsk. 5 days of enlistment n this happens? My condolences. Went dental had my stitches removed. Supposedly healing nicely s said by the dentist. Dunnoe y i seemed awed by him. N no im straight. Hmm...today juz tot of giving dentistry a shot nxt yr aft i ORD. Dentistry gp nid B3 a nt ah? If no nid i apply liaoz haha. Zzz. My pathetic english. Wa bt dentistry the school fees dam ex too. Tsktsk...juz fer the fun of the interview then. heh.

Gdgd. Tml's at least gonna b a more fun day. Soccer wif my jc mates. Always looking forward to this day every month. Absence makes the heart grows fonder since we onli meet half a month. Then prolly joining my fam, cousins n frens at east coast aft tat. Wa dam far lar frm woodlands to east coast. Zzz. Dunnoe hw to go there anyway. Tml juz try liaoz lor. The boy im tutoring speaks wif the maturity of an 18 yr old although hes juz 11. Im kinda learning frm him more than he's learning frm mi haha. Sianz monday back to SAFTI. Time to slog. Soon. But aft tml! XD N i wana buy a shoe. Can I?

2008-06-13T23:18:00.000+08:00

Im tired. Im tied up. And i've tried. Y do i always learn lessons the hard way -.- oh well. This time its juz a hundred plus bucks. Next time a thousand. Then the nxt my life? Seems possible leh nt jk. As far s im concerned anyway. Oh well, i shallnt spell out the details but ya basically my fault. Or so i presume. Tats hw tough my life's prolly gona b. But watever happens, I swear, i relly do, tat nth's gona stop mi frm doin wat i wan to. Gullible and naive, I will grow out of it one day. I swear it. With my life.

Anyway, tats the reason fer the "fer now" part about my gd life. It prolly juz ended eh?

2008-06-10T22:29:00.000+08:00

Today had my first session. Was....kinda weird haha. The girl was nt v gd...the boy was almost perfect. The mother was very understanding bt emphasised tat she wanted to c results -.- Dieded. I muz thank one of the clerks fer the advice he gave mi. Very chim bt reasonable and definitely useful. Once again, im astounded by his vast life experiences. Lol then before i left the mother told mi tat her sister-in-law was lookin fer a tutor. Oh well, the boy was saying i was good. C'mon. I aint wat u tink i m anyway. I failed to answer his qn abt a gibbous moon zzz. Sianz tml gotta stay in cause pple making security passes the whole nite. So suay tml duty. Thurs nxt tuition lucky gt dental so i tink no nid take cab haha. Changed my tuition schedule so prolly its beta fer mi, i think. Anyway juz came back half an hr ago n under heavy rain, and i haven bathed. But im not complaining heh. Life is good, for now.

2008-06-09T22:19:00.000+08:00

Mondays r always the worst days of a wk for s long s i live. For many others i suppose tats the case too unless they hav mondays off -.- Today was relatively ok. Not very busy fer mi s there's always my u/s to suck up all the extra arrows tat come my way, but not fer long i guess. My shield's goin off in july, which is real soon. Read my fren's blog. He said smth abt thinking abt big stuff whn u r still young. Hmm...i guess i juz wan the future to b more stable n safe fer mi n everyone ard mi. The more precautions there r the more i will take up if possible. Tml is the first day of tuition. Gonna cab there ouch. N gotta pay 50% of wat i earn fer the first month. Double ouch. Think im gona cab there if im gonna cont n the parents dun wana change the timing. Cool. Anyway today was tasked to buy basketball nets to fit on the rims in camp. Went to adidas, nike then converse bt all dun hav zzz. Then went world of sports tot cnfm hav. But in the end dun hav. Beside WOS was ntuc, i decided tat sportslink was rather far away n went into ntuc to try my luck. Indeed i was lucky enuf to find it. Hopefully it fits. Either my luck or my laziness helped mi find it lol. But hey no matter wat i wld hav scourged the whole of sg to find the stupid nets k zzz. Beta rest early today. Tml's a long day. Very long indeed.

2008-06-09T00:01:00.001+08:00

Another sunday down. Zai. Means tat the nxt day hafta wrk agn. Today morn ate a bit then lunch went park hotel beside paragon fer buffet lunch. On my way there by train i saw my fren lol. He juz finished giving tuition and was goin to city hall to meet his gf dunnoe buy wat. Ask him say dun wan to say dunnoe y he so secretive sia. Then he goin to try apply dentistry nxt yr n get scholarship. Zai. Given his results n prudentials shldnt b a prob i reckon. Lunch my bro's treat haha. Think altogether 400 or 500 plus cause gt invite other pple also. Cousin, grandfather, auntie and frens. Din eat a lot there. Was quite so-so onli considering it was a hotel zzz. Then after tat walked ard then went home le. Actually wanted to join other frens bt gt held up by the lunch so told them to go first ba. Felt kinda bad there. Sry guys. Today also received a tuition offer. Though nt v gd bt i said i wld giv it a try. Moreover given my heavy wrk schedule i tink more or less i've gotta giv it up. Anyway i'll b giving it a shot this tue. Responsibilities are tough. But it will make u grow up. I am growing up at last, i tink heh.

2008-06-08T01:10:00.000+08:00

Sometimes it is the small things in life which makes one very happy.

Today handed over duty then witnessed a bit of the passing out parade of the arty specs. Hmm...shallnt comment on their presentation as in their turnout in terms of uniform and the combination which i dun relly like. Anyway quite a number of civilians came to witness their boys passing out and it kinda reminded mi of mine. The many hours finally put to gd use, the sweat you bled during the toiling course, at last a bit of recognition and smth fer ur family n loved ones to b proud of. To mi mine was a so-so kinda thing. Its relieving whn u finally walk out of the parade square after the parade that you completed the course unscathed. Oya the near-death incident in Thailand made this especially true lol.

After tat had a lift frm my fren to the mrt then went to my fren's hse bfore goin out shopping. Lol. Shopping u read it rite hahaha. Actually i was kinda bored being at home all day n laze ard so i decided to folo my frens n take a little stroll ard singapore town in a singapore city bus.....lalalalala....zzz. Ok we went city hall then walked ard...went to a few shops c c touch touch n joke joke. Although there were onli 4 of us i felt quite happy. Din feel tis happy in a rather long time. Prolly i was cooped up at home fer too long haha. Then we went to try out sm unreal tournament trial on a comp thing. Quite fun. Like counterstrike. Or quake. U noe 1st person shooter ffa etc yea. Then went millenia walk go redeem my free bag fer opening one bank account wif my mum. Joint d. And nope i did nt strike lottery overnite it was cause the new account had a higher interest rate. Wa the bag dam big. Quite nice. I tink i like it haha. Then put my old bag into it n carried it along. After tat we walked past a few pianos then heard music. Then realised tat one of the pianos the keys were playing by itself n there was the music coming out of it! Not ghost lar lame. N not jk lar. Seems like upon further clarification we found out tat they attached a player to the piano so tat it wld play the song automatically. COOL!! DOUBLE COOL!! And guess wats the cost....drumroll pls....it is....15k juz fer the installation excluding the piano!!! Wa zai sei. Apparently the player comes frm US and fixing it onto the piano requires them shifting the piano back to their wrkshop fer 3 wks. Holy cow. So long n so ex. No wonder so zai sia. Then we went eat lunch at dunnoe whr. Spent 20 bucks. But had a nice meal. Din have such a nice slow fun meal fer a v long time too. Tats y i din mind spending 20 bucks haha. Then went shop around a bit more. Found tat even after GSS sm places r still nt cheap enuf fer my liking. Prolly goin to queenstown one day wif them to buy shoes.

Went bras brasah to search fer 2nd hand bkstores to buy sm bks to keep us occupied. Wa relly c bks until quite giddy. Think the library offers a better and cheaper solution. Then s usual my fren kept making comments abt gals walking past. Haiya tsktsk...if i din notice them prolly they werent gd enuf to catch my eye lol. Then he say gt one wear the shirt until quite exposed. Unbuttoned until dunnoe whr. Think hes lying lar or else a lot of guys wld b walking ard her alrdy.
Then aft tat went home ard 5. Wa quite tired. I was standing and leaning in the train and cld also fall aslp. Lol. But i definitely din feel tat it was a waste of time. Yay nxt wk it will b soccer! Hope i help my team more than i help the opponent -.- Tml cancelled goin play bball cause of my tooth. Feel like goin thou haha. Then later buffet lunch my bro treat nice~~! Tats abt it.

Tats y i say simple things can make one happy. Actually all it takes is juz one thing to make mi happy. Heh, im happy bt nt overjoyed. I juz hope tat everything stays s it is now... but i noe...onli thing tat is constant is...yea u got it...change.

2008-06-05T23:47:00.000+08:00

Silence. I have juz read the blog of a fren of mine. Hmm...very meaningful...touching...yet heartwrenching. Haiz...growth isnt measured through age, rather through the experiences within the limited time one has in his life.

Anyway, today went to NDC to remove my stitches frm my wound. Saw an ex-clzmate there. Then went in to c the dentist. Dunnoe y i was kinda happy to c him haha. Prolly to get rid of the irritating stitches n resume back my normal way of dieting and speech. The moment i saw a syringe on the metal tray i was resigned to my fate in a few minutes time. However to my surprise all he did was to snip mayb twice? Then told mi alrite he shall remove more nxt wk. Zzz. Then he told the female dentist whom first attended to mi whn i reached NDC tat day to do the ops to come over and explained to her my condition. My feeling is tat he prolly is more experienced and is teaching her sm facts abt ops n wat a gd specimen i made. Then he asked mi if i wanted to stay at home and said tat it was a gd reason to stay at home. He asked mi if 2 days mc was enuf. Then i said haha cannot lar gimme today can le im kinda busy. Then he made remarks about wat a gd man n officer i m n tat singapore shld hav more officers like to e female nurse. Lol. It feels kinda good but u noe... or rather i noe tat aint relly true. Anyway he gave mi one day mc so i stayed home today. Tml goin back camp sianz. DO smmore. Haiz. Sighing is bad. So frm nw on i will say zai instead of haiz since its kinda e same spelling. Kinda. Nitez.

2008-06-05T00:07:00.000+08:00

First day at work. The load of work hit mi like the niagara falls as soon as i stepped into the office. No wait, is BEFORE i stepped in whn i was in bunk changing up. More often than not i and my upperstudy r tasked to do other pple's jobs thus our busy times. Oh well, other pple's inefficiency has led to our deficiency, a less healthy mental mindframe to go abt doin wrk. Ok the last sentence was crap. Anyhow, I hav spirtually taken over the apptmt and hopefully i can last till around...september? Yea ard end of sep. Tat wld b whn my understudy comes. Heh. Come sep many of my frens wld alrdy b preparing to take off and clear leave. Dam.

Today there was a rather nice break during wrk, or rather a short conversation wif a doctor while we were requiring his aid fer official reasons. Omg, the school fees fer medicine during studies r like ard 80k fer 5 yrs....80k!!!! HOLY MACARONI IN JACCUZI! Yea alrite he took a loan frm his dad's cpf then he's still repaying his loan. He's 26 this yr...and surprise surprise...ok mayb nt so surprising...but he's getting married soon!! Wow. It muz b relly hard fer him to repay his loan and get married at the same time but hey he's a doc dude. If his future's aint bright, i aint hav no future. Come to which i tot of another random stuff. If u mention doctors or lawyers to pple, they will b "ooh-ing" and "ahh-ing" away in awe. Bankers...managers....meeeaybe. Engineers, construction workers, they will b "chey-ing" or "oic-ing" for the less mean. Hmm...if onli my results were gd enuf fer medicine, i prolly wld hav given it a shot. Not tat i aspire to b a doctor since i tink im kinda afraid of operating of living things esp on another of your kind, but i mean the experience wld b invaluable. What comes with it s a bonus i guess is the status. Anyway, tat doc said his passion was to b a doc so i guess he gt his wish n another enthusiastic doc was born. I wonder if i spelled wrongly doc s dog in any of the above sentences....

I promise i will study hard in uni. Dam it tats wat i always said since i was sec sch i tink. Bt i always fail to do so. Hopefully it doesnt. I better not.

2008-06-03T23:26:00.000+08:00

I am a miser. In terms of wat i do nt hav i tend to b a bit more thrifty with the ways i manage them. One good example is money. Im by far a wealthy person juz a fairly average one, or perhaps more humbly slightly below. Money isn't everything in this world bt i believe it is one of the more essential stuff which everyone muz n shld hav a certain amount at least.

Spending has nvr been an integral part of my life so thankfully im nt a shopaholic female. Whatever tat i can get s long s it suits my taste or i deem acceptable shall b accepted, s soon s of course it is within my very limited budget. Smtimes i wld sacrifice a bit of quality fer price, and smtimes, its worth while others its juz wat pple wld say gettin cheated fer gettin cheapskate stuff.

The problem wif mi spending so much on stuff which costs a lot yet having the same functions s one which costs much less is tat i juz cannot cross my guilt barrier. Smhw, having 3 bros still studying n 2 younger than mi coupled wif the fact tat onli my dad is supporting the family has always weighted on my mind tat my expenditure shld b kept to a minimum. True, i wldnt mind splurging a bit on special occasions bt if its a weekly or even fortnightly event, i wld try to avoid those stuff.

You may say money is to spend nt to save n scrimp. Yea sure, but it doesnt apply to mi nw s far s im concerned. Not tat i hav a family to support but the fact tat i've yet to finish my studies n my studies wld probably b rather costly is sorta reasonable enuf. My upperstudy is tinking of signing on to army fer 3 yrs juz to hav his tuition fees in uni paid off and hav a bit of savings before coming out to society debt-free. Dunnoe y hes so desperate. He onli has a sister and has a family car. Both his parents are wrking too. Looks can smtimes b deceiving anyway.

Tml i wld b goin back to camp. Yawnz. Finished my 1 wk of mc n back to wrk. A lot of wrk. Piled up n piling. I've a feelin im gonna b dam busy fer the whole month of June. Dam busy. Cool. Just cool.

2008-06-02T00:50:00.000+08:00

What a chain of extraordinary events. Either my life is dam happening, or my life is damned with happenings. Screw it. I juz realised today tat act its nt my rite cheek tat is swollen because its recoverin frm my ops but i used my tougue to feel fer the first time today n realised tat its cause of extra stuff the dentist put there such tat it looked like a bulge. Cool. It felt like soft tissue, soft gums. Eeewww.... N i can feel a stitch or two somewhr along the exterior. Hopefully nxt thurs whn he removes the stitches he removes the extra "gums" or smth. Or else...or else...yea or else wat huh, cant tink of it either bt i noe its gonna b smth bad. 2 more days of mc n im contemplating goin back camp in the noon or smth to get back to the pace of wrk asap. Hmm...beta nt lar...it will b rather troublesome if anything happens to me outside about my mouth...prolly the gums dropping out or smth liddat. I also realised smth. Now i cannot relly taste the whole taste of the food i eat nw. Ok...mayb its cause i eat on onli one side...lets hope its tat way. Alrite im tired. Goin to konk out alrdy. Before tat a brush of my remaining teeth...n hope tat portion remains intact...till this thurs tat is.

2008-05-29T21:56:00.001+08:00

The loss of a few essential things in our daily life which we hav always taken fer granted is very painful indeed. Not being able to eat properly, not being able to cough or sneeze too hard, not able to use a straw to drink beverages, and not even able to afford a smile juz to console oneself about the current bleak situation. Unfortunately it is the things in life tat u cant control which is lost although u try ur best to retain it. Smtimes, its juz hard to put it in words. Smtimes, men n fate juz dun seem to click, juz like mi n the name of my blog...

2008-05-29T14:22:00.000+08:00

I've a very gd idea fer pple who wish to lose weight. Either u gt extremely sick or go fer ops. Either way is u eat less food, or rather have limited food choices. I'm living by liquid food everyday now and its kinda healthy i've gotta admit. However, the lack of nutrition and choices has my appetite down and i think i hav lost a few kilos fer the past few days. Gastric seems to b kiking in juz at abt the right moment. This sat's my grandfather's bdae n the buffet seems to b laughing at mi fer prolly nt able to devour it. Hmm...mayb this is a prelude to hw i wld b whn im old and aging. Helpless, weak, slow, and lonely....

2008-05-28T18:41:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was the most painful day I ever went through possibly in the twenty yrs of my life. Even worst than fighting in the jungles with heavy load and a torrential rain, trust mi. It all started with a happy tuesday fer mi. Had chicken chop fer breakfast, my second one in camp my first at hm then prepared to go fer my dental visit which i postponed one month ago. Given the fact that my top rite inner molar often exuded blood whn i applied pressure while it, i was rather glad to hav the tooth fixed. Thus i went to a neighbouring place to make a visit to the dentist.

The dentist a tall, (but nt as tall as mi) slender lady prolly in her late twenties at the most, told mi 2 options upon examination of my teeth. Since my teeth was alrdy quite badly decayed even to the roots, first would b to hav a root canal. 3 sessions fer the root canal treatment which would involve cleaning the roots of tat particular idiotic tooth and 3 more following that fer crowning. To top up the top of ur tooth so that it would be...eh...normal. Since it was highly unlikely fer mi to get the full treatment during my national service time, I would hav to pay an additional 600 bucks to do the crowning process outside at a private clinic IF everything fer the root canal went well. The second option was to do an extraction. Hmm...extraction would be free and i wld b rid of the pain i had to go thru during root canal treatment. So obviously i went fer the extraction given impatient mi.

1345. This was the approximate time I started the extraction. I think i gt jabbed 6 times in the gums. Then waited 5 mins fer the anaesthesia to take effect. Then the lady dentist began Operation tooth removal. Fer the nxt hr, bits of my tooth broke off as it had decayed so much to the extent that it was rather brittle. The lady dentist gave up and sought fer the help of another male one. Dun worry, the show's juz beginning. Hang on. The male dentist looked rather young s well and seemed to b frm the same course of dentistry s the female. He said after several failed initial attempts, "Hmm... this looks fun...lemme try it out..." and proceeded. I think throughout the entire procedure of extracting my tooth, no wait correction, of ATTEMPTING to extract my tooth, they used up most if nt all of the tooth extracting tools in the dental centre. I think i managed to pick up a few weird names in the process. One most common one they spoke abt was the sharp pick, i think.

A few minutes after the male attempted to extract my tooth, I started to feel the pain getting more extreme. I was thinking, "Cool, i think the anaesthesia's wearing out. Cool. I'm dead." It became too unbearable and so bleak that he would extract the tooth soon such tat i told him i was feeling pain. Itchy mouth. I had another 4 jabs in my gums. And he continued. Finally after half an hour, he gave up. He started speaking abt referring mi to NDC(National Dental Centre) or SGH. At tat moment my mouth was alrdy tired and sore frm opening fer the past one n a half hrs. I prayed tat it either it ended soon or end my life. The pain was kinda horrible. Cool. The male dentist then told mi the situation. My tooth was too brittle and broke to many pieces. Yes i witnessed about 8 pieces?? Thus there were onli roots left and he couldnt take them out. Moreover there were three roots. He also said smth abt nt trying further as they could be pushed to some air space and then be v troublesome to take out.

The moment i sat up and tried to stand up from the chair i had been lying on fer the past half hr, I almost fainted. I felt rather groggy and my hands were very cold. Seemed like excessive loss of blood but i guess not if nt i wld hav been sent to the hospital a long time ago. They put a gauze to cover wat was left of my tooth and told mi to go NDC. It juz gets beta n beta huh.

I stumbled my way out of the dental centre and made my way to NDC. 1 hr journey i tink, i was almost semi-conscious. Made my way to the second lvl n waited fer my turn. Luckily it wasnt tat long. The dentist who saw mi was another lady. Young again. She did an initial checkup then referred mi to do xrays. Then the verdict was out. "Alrite, you hav 3 roots to your tooth but one of them is being pushed into the sinus so we nid an operation to remove it." Operation. I was kinda unsure wat was tat so i asked if i was gg to b given general anaesthesia. Then she said local. Then i said alrite lets do it now. Then she said since you r under 21 we nid ur parent's approval. I was stunned. So serious meh nid parent's approval. Then i made a lot of phone calls after tat. Haiz. The feeling was dam sad. Troubling others agn whn i cldnt even help them at all. In the end my father came down frm wrk. I shall fast forward a bit and go st8 to the operating venue.

First my dad signed the papers then the surgeon briefed us abt the procedure. Omg, i tot it onli happened in the movies or shows. Then he told us the possible consequences and tried to assure us that everything will b alrite. I felt rather safe in his hands although he din look old n experienced. He was prolly in his early 30s but was very calm n confident. I had to wear a gown, shoe cover and hair cover. Btw i was still wearing my uniform. I went inside the room sat down then it began. Estimated time fer operation was 45mins to an hr.

9 jabs went in. 6 to my gums and 3 to my tougue. After fifteen minutes, it finally began. The lights looming above seemed like "the white light" you see at the end of ur life journey. I began tinking wat i've been doin my life and cldnt tink of much. Shit. Wat a waste of my life if i died then n there. The nurses even coverd my eyes and told mi nt to worry during the ops and juz think of nice stuff. Lol. I'll try i said. It finally began. I could feel my tooth being drilled and my gums opened up forcefully. Some of the drilling parts were painful bt i endured. Hey so many pple there cannot act so cowardly ma afterall zzz. After dunnoe hw long the dentist said alrite everything is out. Then he proceeded to close up the wound left by the teeth. How to do tat? He onli told mi using some of my fats to cover it. Then now i realise its by stitching as well. Ouch.

The removal of the roots was amazingly shorter than the covering up pt. My lips were being pulled till they were swollen and the few drops of blood i saw i hoped were onli frm within my mouth. After 1.5 hrs finally, it was over. I thanked the nurses and the dentist frm the bottom of my heart as they stayed overtime specially to do the ops. I walked out n my dad was there waiting and complained abt the long waiting time. Lol. Sry daddy. Im real sry fer wastin ur time. He then asked mi if it was worst than having fever. I juz smiled and said anything is beta than operations.

After tat my dad went to gt his stuff frm his wrkplace while i walked home. The whole operation cost mi $588 and the medicine $42. Ouch. So much fer paying fer pain. The pain I endured fer the past 8 hrs hung on to my mind and soon evolved into a phobia fer dentists. Fer those out there who think its the end, nxt thurs i've gotta go back n hav my stitches removed. Nice. What was amazing was tat I din shed a tear the entire time. I was more worried abt hw i wld be affected aft doin the ops. Now I cant play table tennis fer my formation. I cant brief my superiors about SAF day. I cant eat solid food. I cant do any exercise. Im like a useless handicap. Stupid tooth. Stupid tooth of mine. Even when im typing this, i juz realised the pain one goes thru in one's life will forever be etched in memory, in life or after death.

2008-05-25T22:09:00.000+08:00

Wow. It's kinda weird if you can predict the future. I just realised if onli i had tat mutant power... it wld b....kinda cool? Oh well, snapping back to reality... its back to work tml and this wk's supposedly gonna b the wk i officially take over my post frm my upperstudy. There's SAF day coming up too so its gonna b kinda packed fer mi fer the nxt month or so zzz. Work, work and more work. Lol, juz rmbred today went out wif frens to play bball. Actually it was drizzling and we wanted to play Citadels. But one idiotic fren say last nite went out to fren's bdae pty then v tired wana go hm slp zzz. In the end we went play ball. Anyway the main thing was tat I outdid myself and made them lose all their bets on mi. Ok private joke. haha idiots sia they all. But kinda amazed at u guys analysis. Onli u missed out the part tat it wasnt onli mi u guys were betting on ha. Think i'll go slp now. Kinda fazed by the fact tat there's another wk of wrk coming rite up. Tuesday's dental apptment. Hopefully all my teeth stays intact after tat. But its another rest period fer mi heh. Juz realised poems sound a little uncool. Scrap tat n stick to the normal prose writing shall we?

2008-05-22T22:48:00.000+08:00

An impatient wait,
What I usually hate.
Just a word or cue,
And it can be through.

2008-05-20T23:49:00.000+08:00

How envious I am...how envious indeed...

2008-05-20T23:39:00.000+08:00

An afternoon nap,
Lovely as sap.
But once came night,
The presence of blight.

With rage unleashed,
Tolerance so breached,
What nasty atrocity,
With thick viscosity.

As storm dies down,
Slowly yet compound,
All that is built,
Fallen to guilt.

At last contained,
Calm has pertained.
Silence then reigned,
And tears all drained.

2008-05-19T21:58:00.000+08:00

Tired of the mounting days,
Picking up after remaining rays.
Thinking more and more and more,
All of I should ignore.

Everyone comes with a pack of queries,
I for one have a very long series.
Most usually answered by simply work,
A few just only make you quirk.

After so few many days definitely you can concur,
The question is do I have to have an answer?

2008-05-14T23:29:00.000+08:00

A simple task,
Yet another mask,
Enraged and disgust.

Sitting up still,
There is no quill,
Eyes try to close,
Ears shutting out,
Leaving me on a bottomless hill.

Life's a line,
A transverse incline,
Undo no option,
Guess only adoption,
How with you i wish i always dine.

Void embraces me, are you void?

2008-05-13T00:46:00.000+08:00

My throat is slit,
My heart is wilt.
None of me remains,
Cept my physical taints.

No meaning no more,
My new lifeless core.
Leaving to rot,
Into another not.

Winning the game,
So seldom I name.
Surely its foe,
Has always my toe.

All I have I dare not claim,
Lest soon left less than my name.
Requesting for a multiplier hero,
Yet one number will always be zero.

Men are never single islands,
But what if all are devoid of hands?
Perhaps I and world are two separate being,
I'm the servant, the other is king.

Everything turns into a nasty maze,
Forcing me into a daze.
As I wait with a transfixed gaze,
What ends me is the graveyard's haze.

Disappointing wimp I've been,
I wished I will never be seen.
Only a flick from the mystical of wands,
Will I be broken from my nasty bonds.

Down and dead the same old fate,
Up and alive comes my spirit's date.
Please spare it as it tries to fleet,
Or banish all of me will be sweet.

2008-04-30T23:32:00.000+08:00

WTF. Seriously. My last chance disappears into a puff of smoke... from a passive smoker's cigarette...paradox and irony...i noe nt hw, i noe nt wat...I resume my usual favourite character, a loser.....

2008-04-27T11:27:00.000+08:00

Last chance at redemption.

2008-04-07T22:25:00.000+08:00

Whn a blog is empty fer this long, it can onli represent 2 things abt its owner. No wait, I cant afford to own a blog anyway. Either he's over the moon....or deep down in gloom. No prizes fer guessing which. Dang, dang and dang! Shallnt elaborate wat im whining abt bt yea i guess its the usual stuff. Rite nw i dunnoe if my life's gd. Actually i dunnoe if it ever will be. Im a pessimist i guess. Headshot on my character by one of my frens. Always preparing fer the worst situation which may arise then watever that falls short will b counted my fortune instead of a misfortune. Dun get it? Too bad i guess bt aiya im qt stressed abt wrk, my new job. Zzz boring and tiring, mentally tat is. Which explains y im still up at this nt so early hr. Shyt. My life sucks nw i guess....

2008-02-23T15:52:00.000+08:00

Loser(adj./n.) -- describes someone who always fails to do things the right way or the desired way he wants to. eg: Why is he such a loser? OR a person who fails in life. eg: ME.

2008-01-01T20:21:00.000+08:00

How fast 4 days of hols pass. And ya back to camp alrdy. Past few days has been a mix. Frustrating yet enjoyable. Oh well wat a mix u may say bt ya. The onli gd thing is tat this wk's a short one. Bt im bking out on sat zzz. The new yr's arrived bt it seems tat the events in 2007 r having a drag effect on mi. Come to think of it if there ever is a mystical pool where u can emerge renewed and removed of the past yr's happenings and...alrite i shall come back to reality. A few more wks then of to thailand liaoz yay. 7 days of live firing. Oh no qt late le. Beta make a move. Oya if there was ever smth which cld record ur most defining moments in life in words or pictures, tat wld b perfect. Back to camp i go....zzz...

2007-12-25T19:27:00.000+08:00

Merry Xmas, merry xmas and merry xmas. Your M E R R Y X M A S was the best. :]

2007-12-23T02:36:00.000+08:00

Tap tap. 0241 is the time. The onli reasons y i m still awake at such a late hour at home is either im too happy or juz the opposite. Most of the time sadly, its the latter. I m starting to tink im a jinx. Ungentlemanly, immature, insensitive, tactful. Hmm...familiar huh. Yep tats mi i nearly forgt. My camp training in the army has juz risen by a level or two. Now every week we hav sm sort of outfield training bt at least the gd pt is tat we hav 2 more wks in which a holiday is situated in. Did a 9km rd march followed by some last minute casavac. One-to-one. Prolly its the slack regime before tat caused mi to b tired out for the first time in months. Months u gt tat rite. Set aside training. A little of myself. Perhaps....my flaws r haunting mi agn. This time wif a vengeance. My eyes r nw squinted. Face wrinkled rdy to curl up to slp. Occasional yawns accompany the typing sounds i make on my keyboard apart from random noises in the silent night. My heart is heavy. Very heavy. I dunnoe y bt my heart relly feels heavy. Mayb it aint a metaphor after all. I can feel many knots, entangled and untangled, untangled n re-entangled.

In my hands r cards. The house is forcing me to go for a showhand. Should I? They say the house always wins in Vegas. Well, I aint in Vegas anyway. My cards aint gd, mediocre, bare, average, and probably making the mark of...pathetic. No hesitation about whether i wan to play them all down. Soon. Real soon.

Tick tock goes the clock. 0300 hrs. My jaw hurts from the yawning. My throat shrivels at the lack of moisture. N my limbs cry out for zero exertion. My mind slips between the realm of the conscious and the unconscious. The past week's events has been like that. Surreal yet reality. What am i doing? Questions burn.....and continue to......

2007-12-02T15:13:00.000+08:00

My family went to m'sia and I'm all alone at hm boohoo. Bking in ltr this evening makes it worse. In addition nxt wk's confinement makes it beyond worse. Sometimes I dunnoe y i m so lucky to hav her by my side. Sry i let u down. I promise I will change for u.

2007-12-02T11:52:00.000+08:00

Last wk i failed SOC. This week i failed to gt ippt gold. nxt week wat will i fail? Wat abt nxt mth? or the nxt yr?
Mayb in the end i will fail life. Yay. So much fer all the studying i've done. Onli to fail everything. Wat can i nt fail huh. Hmm...mayb i can nvr fail to nt fail. Cool. Whine n whine puny mi. Tats wat u do best. 9 words of fail in 5 sentences...Nice. Wait. Enchanted was nice. The kiss of the one you love is the most powerful thing in the world. Is there relly no such thing s happily ever after in reality? Or is there even happy? Fer mi?

Founder of a totally brand new disease,
Ailment soughts nvr to cease.
I am not really exactly proud of this,
Looking pathetic is my piece.

2007-11-26T01:12:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, i relly think i m the worst person to b ard wif. Hw so v true tat my father told mi tat whenever i hav nth gd to say juz shut up. My greatest weakness I've realised over the yrs is my inability to get serious whn the situation calls for it resulting in mi lettin down nt onli my peers bt also my family on numerous occasions. When i was young my fighting spirit was still burning, doing every task wif pride n conscientiousness. Now, its onli a matter of gettin it over n done wif, end of story. What a loser. I dunnoe hw long I will cont to b like this. Bt hopefully n crucially, i've gt to turn over. Not over a new leaf, bt a less lousy one. I wish, i wish and i wish. How i wish my wishes were nt merely wishes....

2007-11-10T02:24:00.000+08:00

Losing everything of which I do not deserve,
Often thereafter I will carefully preserve,
Sinking in the reality harsh,
Ending up lost in a messed up marsh,
Rounding it up yet another shattered nerve.

I hope it is juz my imagination. Is that bad feeling for real? Pls dun be...

2007-11-04T01:30:00.000+08:00

Another week of arty training ends. Yawnz. Its back to the old jc days where lessons r conducted in clzrms airconditioned and well suited fer the zzz monster to prey on us. Oh well. I guess i juz hav to bring in more tidbits the nxt time i bk in. Luckily nxt wk is a short wk. I cannot c her this wk. Hopefully i cn come nxt wed. I miss her =< I hope she will do well in her crit ex.

Days and weeks winking past,
Excited especially when they go fast.
Arrows from cupid fly like free,
Raining down with target me.

In my mind it's all about she.

Month of one is here to come,
I never dream we will be the lucky some.
Slipping through I hope i do,
Sigh, and only success I hope i go.

U my dear i miss you so...

2007-10-21T02:18:00.000+08:00

The first wk of training at khatib camp. Oh well wasnt much of training rather more of lessons instead and some practical stuff. Feels like sch haha. Bt nxt wk hav to stand in the hot sun learning the various mechanisms of the gun etc. Oh well. Shit, tat feeling. I hope its false. I relly hope so...

2007-10-14T01:29:00.000+08:00

Wow. I dunnoe if im dreaming or wat. It feels to mi like one. If it is i hope i dun wake up forever haha. Today went out wif frens fer lunch at fish n co. then ltr go home le. Bought a white t shirt fer mi to bk in n out of camp at giordano. Costs 15 bucks lor zzz waste money. Sian tml bk in le. Haiz then my parents reminded mi to apply fer scholarships agn this yr. Hw to? Results so sucky zzz. Forgt it dad n mum, i guess im juz a born loser unlike my elder bro. haiz. Dun noe when my dream will end if it will ever. Hopefully it doesnt. Pls dun let it end...

The Answer

13 October 2007
That morn to me was seventh heaven.
The exact words so crystal clear,
The sweetest one no doubt was dear.

My heart thumped wildly,
My mind deflated mildly.
My eyes hastily scanning,
My hands quickly typing.

Soon just like any other quicksand,
Sinking in I was to yy-land.
Silently I hoped for a fest,
Surely in my life this will be the best.

Now all I hope is forever,
New n newer but never never.
Nice it will always be to pass,
Nil unhappiness surrounding us.

2007-10-13T01:08:00.000+08:00

A memorable nite. A memorable nite indeed. 13th oct 2007. Time: 0130.

2007-10-12T10:05:00.000+08:00

Back from brunei, at last. I dun noe wat it wld hav been like fer my infantry mates when they take their jcc come end of november when they touch down singapore bt i can assure its gona b a relieved and estactic one. Phew...brunei cannot b described in juz a post or even posts. It truly plays a defining role in ur life no matter who u r and relly reflects the character u possess. Ah well, the toughest pt of my training is over and at least i can tell myself i did my best and completed the course in one piece. Dam it lar, i sustained onli sm scratches frm the ferocious plants in the brunei forest bt when i gt back to camp i suffered more patches of blood on my body cause i was running my way to the toilet n fell. How ironic to injure myself in the least likely location possible. Oh well clz gathering's been postponed, today i gotta bk in n i still dun feel well. Hopefully i cant make it home n hope the uniform doesnt aggravate my ugly wounds. Zzz.

2007-10-02T11:36:00.000+08:00

Argh...today goin brunei liaoz n im nt feeling well at all...im feeling rather sick dam it. Cold plus sore throat plus threatening pulses of heat waves in my body threaten to tear mi apart. Died. I hope an afternoon nap can do the trick. The harsh weather of brunei aint gona help in my recovery if tat doesnt help. Nvm onli 10 days. I shall perservere...i muz finish it...allow my body to pls...those tat overlook mi...

2007-10-01T23:47:00.001+08:00

No wkend posts cause i was too sianz thinking abt the trip to brunei, which is tml nite. I'm gona take it in T3 n prolly reach the campsite ard afternoon since the boat trip is gona b 3 hrs long. zzz. Argh man, brunei...cant relly imagine wats worse than platoon field camp. A river crossing, navigation exercise fer ard 4 days, and finally a climb up a steep knoll. Cool...heard tat e river is infested wif leeches. Great, and almost everyone who swims across it will hav it stuck to sm pt of ur body...eeeww...12th oct wld b the date i'll b back. So no dumb entries this wkend. Wa, cant imagine hws it like on 12th oct morning haha. I wld feel dam song lar. That is if i complete all that is required of us and nt fall out due to injuries or my weak constitution. Hope i brought all that is required at brunei. Oh well, i guess i juz gota do wat i gota do. Hopefully i survive the jungles n climate of brunei and make it to the clz gathering on 13th. Wa...nice food...hahaha....

Heart you have stolen from me,
Eyes you took away from thee.
Now even soul you attempt to,
Nothing left cept a silly fool.

2007-09-29T01:33:00.000+08:00

Yawnz. Spent the whole day in front of the com. Wat a waste. Did my physio exercises and then went out fer dinner wif my fren. Aft tat bought chicken essence fer a sick fren then went home. Juz realised tat smtimes i feel like an idiot doin sm things. Oh well. I guess tats juz mi. Perhaps an idiot fer life.

2007-09-27T23:36:00.000+08:00

Had a short signals lesson in preparation fer brunei trip. 4 more days till brunei. Sian. Went to beach rd aft tat to gt the stuff nided fer the trip. Argh...knew tat army stuff were nvr cheap. Then came home at last at ard 2 plus. Then went online. Chatted. Then my infantry frens called mi to go out. But i say i lazy to go out. They were watching larry n chuck. Felt a little bad rejecting them. Tml's another mini-clz outing among my sec sch guy frens. Dunnoe if i will go. Argh having fungus growth...wat a time wif brunei coming up. Im afraid of brunei. Seniors said tat it was worse than platoon field camp. Oh well, i guess juz chiong once n fer all ba. No choice anyway huh. Now my onli true hopes come frm within myself, wat i can n cannot do and do not encompass those tat n who surround mi. I've learn tat its tough n risky to depend on external bodies, more reliably is to depend on urself. I dunnoe wat i shld do relly. Pathetic.

Thrust mi wif ur blade of word,
Soul of thy wilt akin a fallen bird.
A living dead prowling aimlessly,
Scavenger merely never fearlessly.

2007-09-26T23:03:00.000+08:00

The end of service term. The end of 23km rd march which ended wif our third bar presentation parade at the top of a knoll and a fast march back to wingline. Being trained in the most siong wing in ocs fer my batch, we caught up wif another wing which left 10 minutes earlier than us and even reached back in record time. That's wat u gt i guess frm having a commando wing com zzz. Wat a term it has been. Tough training metted out it was true bt strong frenships bonded wasnt false either. Today before i left fer home wif all my stuff, i had a last look at my bunk my home fer the past 3 mths, nt to mention the faces i've gone thru trng wif. At first were juz common trading of taking care etc. bt when i reached my buddy, i immediately burst into tears. Period. I cried like a baby. He was a great buddy. Despite the various differences we had, he was prolly one of the best buddies one could ever hav. Then everybody started crowding ard consoling mi and 2 of my frens who performed during social nite sang the same song "Home" agn. The second time i saw my buddy he started welling up too. We hugged each other agn and promised each other that we wld make it to the parade square come 15 march nxt yr. On my way down to pick up my bag, i met my plt mate frm bmt. He was staying in infantry. I hugged him and we both made the same promise too. I knew our friendships wld always b present bt i can onli long fer it aft tat fateful moment. It was the first time i hugged so many guys at one time. In between tat i went to c my instructor. He laughed n said he five yrs also nvr cry i onli 3 mths cry and gave his final words of encouragement. I will do my best i swear in arty.

Smells of roses engulf the breeze,
Clearing airways of choked up hearts.
Finally done with perpetuate ease,
Another appears surely in random parts.

2007-09-22T23:35:00.000+08:00

Woke up at 1045 today. Wa v long nvr enjoyed such a thorough slp although i forced myself out of my bed... Anyway once i was awake i chked my phone n realised a couple of missed calls and msgs. Realised frens were calling mi out fer lunch at 1130 at city hall area. Zzz. Rushed to gt dressed and awake and groggily walked out of house. Halfway realised tat they changed the time to 1215 to suit mi. Haiz make mi walk back home to wait fer another half hr or so then set off. Went to sm ex italian restaurant at raffles city tower fer lunch. Zzz waste money lor all the servings were so small n made mi lose another 24 bucks zzz. But the food was nice. Too bad the servings were small zzz. After tat went to window shop fer stuff tat frens nid. After tat went arcade play. Haha dam long nvr go then suddenly go qt nice. Spent dunnoe hw much in there. Mayb...ard 10? Zzz im a wastrel i admit. I think my expenditure this mth alone can exceed over 400 plus. Cool. Then saw one of my plt mates wif his gf n one more gal at andersons. Then came home fer lunch. Then nth le. And tml is bk in day, agn. How time flies when u r out in the civilian world. Theres gona b a clz gathering cum celeb fer the oct babies on 13 oct. Dunnoe if i wld b in brunei then. Oh well, arty hopefully is s slack s i hope it will b. One more to pro term. Artillery!

2007-09-22T01:22:00.001+08:00

The end of social nite. Hmm...okok lor the nite. Dun ask mi wats gd n wats bad. Ok mayb i'll name the gd stuff. I got to take lots of pics wif my frens. Nw i noe bringing cams to such events make it even more meaningful. If u wish to c hw ugly n disgusting i m during tat nite, which is last nite, u can gt it frm mi. Tats all fer the gd stuff. Yawnz dam tired liaoz. Act nt tired lar juz bored. I think my shirt i wore tat nt bad lar. Qt nice. Thx mum haha. No wait i wanted to wear it de so thank mi! Zzz. I guess tat more or less concludes service term cept fer the 23km rd march on tues. I relly will miss my mates. I hope i can make it till joint term n c them back agn. Love u guys dudes.

2007-09-21T13:07:00.000+08:00

Yawnz. Tonite is social nite liaoz. Darn gt to make my hair made up n my clothes settled. The dress code is smart casual. Hopefully i dun underdress. Hopefully i hav fun. Nw gt to go my grandfather's hse a while to kip him company. Ltr prolly goin over to bishan to gt sm stuff fer my date. Zzz spoil market all my frens go buy things then no choice i hav to buy smth also. Haiz. I hav a feeling my nxt blog entry is gona b long. Or super short. Watever it is wish mi all the best n tat i dun screw anything up today, again. Zzz.

2007-09-20T20:37:00.000+08:00

Wow, a rare thursday bkout. Hopefully it will nt b the onli one in my occ. Now i noes how it feels like fer patients to noe all of a sudden that they hav cancer. Dun worry i dun hav, i think. Anyway yea i've gt a perfectly legitimate reason fer the medical officer to put mi out of course. And i wld hav if i hadnt protested. The verdict is out. The pain that has been bothering my knee is due to an inborn abnormality. The gap of the joint of my left knee cap n bone is uneven on both sides and that causes the pain. That's wat the sports doctor said. Then the physiotherapist said I've tight muscles and that there is excessive grinding of the knee bones. Zzz. Cool man. Oh well im goin off to artillery where its rumoured to b much slacker than infantry. Hopefully tat relly is the case. This wk i completed my 16km road march. I juz realised tat its super unwise to b the rear man of the rear platoon when marching in wing lvl unless u r super fit cause most of the time u gotta jog to catch wif the rest of the wing. And leading songs along the way doesnt tire u out. Instead it sorts of diverts u away from the load u r carrying. Anyway, wat cld b heavier than an MG manpack i carried during the assault in plt field camp? Today was another 6km fast march. Reason was cause we were nt conditioned enuf to complete 16km. Zzz. Rubbish. I cld hav finished 23km on tat nite and gotten my third bar rank. Ok a bit haolian bt i rather gt it over n done wif. Nt tat im sure i wldnt fall out bt oh well, i wld hav gone fer it given the chance. Then i didnt participate today cause i felt tat it wld b beta fer mi to gt a full recovery to take on the 23km nxt wk than fall out bfore i gt my senior bar. Obviously my pc suspected mi of chao keng. Zzz too bad im goin arty anyway theres onli 2 wks left...wait one more nia lol. Gotta thank my instructor before i leave. He rocked man. Anyway i found my social nite date last nite. N tml is social nite. Cool huh. Hope tml nite will b enjoyable. I truly hope. Today a few pple fell out aft the fast march due to heat exhaustion. One of them was my jc fren. He didnt complete his 16 km march to due to the same reason n was extremely disappointed wif himself. He kept telling instructors trying to help him recover tat he was disappointed n was afraid tat he wld b sent to the PRB, which was the performance review board. After each semester the bottom few of each wing will go n c the commander and a decision will b made whether to kip them in the course or kik them out. He said the same few sentences n tears started rolling down his pale cheeks despite his condition. I teared silently s i watche d him comforted by instructors and suddenly a feeling of bonding wif my fellow frens overwhelmed mi. I pulled my jockey cap lower s i watched silently. Smhw, i made a silent promise to myself tat in times of need, i will definitely help my fellow mates out to the best of my ability. My fate has been sealed. A screwed up officer-to-be hanging on to his course fer dear life. Now i can onli help others hug on even more tightly to theirs. The difference between us? Cause...its mi.

2007-09-15T01:01:00.000+08:00

A mix of gd n bad fer this wk. Good thing and prolly the onli one is that i wld b posted to arty. Cool my dream come true haha. Now fer the bad stuff. First, I went to the MO to report sick cause of my knee and gt a referral to AH. Hopefully the monday session wldnt b one of horror and i can make it thru to commission in arty. Then i gt ps-ed by my date. Make it my ex-date. Zzz. One wk left. No date fer social nite. Cool. Looks like 3 extras r closing in on mi nw. Sometimes i wonder if im relly screwed up. I relly wonder who my date will b if any. I wonder i wonder and i wonder. Here I am. A wanderer in my own realm of destiny....

2007-09-09T02:17:00.000+08:00

Yea i survived plt field camp, tattered, torn but still alive. No wonder the senior said one of the worst days of his life. I know partially y now. Anyway field camp started on sat nite although it was scheduled to b on sunday. Y? Change parades and irritating field pack inspections which required all the different packs to b at various parts of the parade square helped us slp a lot quicker tat nite. N we woke up at 4 the nxt day to sort out our stuff among the wing. Retarded huh. Then another fieldpack inspection followed by a lot of rushing started off our field camp. Btw there was a water point allocated fer the nite before fieldcamp which many of us tot was to serve s a warning to the new sispec crossovers. Zzz.

Day 1. We went on a training exercise without troops which meant non-tactical n visited our objective which we were suppose to assault on day 3. Long way lor. Then in the afternoon was plt IA drills where we revised hw to react upon enemy contact frm all directions. Yawnz. Boring and tiring. N i popped a smoke bomb during it. Cool. The nite was left to us to harbour in the ants infested marsiling camp site. Btw it rained tat day. We were drenched wif a combi of sweat n rainwater n a little mud. If u think tat was bad enuf wait till the second day. We had qt a substantial amt of rest tat nite.

Day 2. Platoon battle course. Luckily i was employed to b the enemy so nt shag at all. Onli had to battle the ants at our site. After tat was learning of setting up wire obstacles. Our section instructor volunteered our section n we had to set up a demo wif ants swarming our boots into our socks n eventually the various parts of your body. U would b amazed at the speed of the ants when they swarm u. Mi? Well juz realised it was marsiling after all, the ants haven. After tat was qt slack le. Then had lunch. Then rained. Qt heavily. Enuf fer us to gt soaked before reaching the training shed. Was feeling cold n had to move out agn in slight drizzle aft a while. Brr. Had early rest tat nite. 3 times tat nite were short bursts of rain. We were thanking our lucky stars. Then the fourth time, we juz ran out of stars. A heavy downpour ensued. There was a dilemna on whether to kip ourselves or our fieldpacks dry. In the end, both were drenched. We slept on whereever we cld tat nite. Cold, wet and muddy. N onli the second day.

Day3. Assault of objective s a coy began. I was tasked wif being the assistant MG gunner. Cool i had to carry a manpack of about 35kg fer the journey to our objective n nearly died i swear. The guy who took over from mi aft the mission was dying s well. Coupled wif the fact tat he is stronger n fitter than mi, I think i did well. In the late afternoon, it was wat everybody looked forward to. Digging. Dig, dig n more digging...

Day 4. Digging continued. We had to do a shellscrap each n a fire trench bet 2 pple. Shell scrap body length n fire trench chest height. We finished it in the afternoon proper. At nite we were screwed badly. Comms were nt set up and we were in a mess. Fieldpacks overhead n limitless pushups were our stand-2 fer tat day. It didnt rain miraculously. It was definitely the last thing we wanted to b sleeping in mud wells.

Day 5. We had a pleasant surprise. We realised tat we were goin home tat day due to the fact that we finished digging fast enuf. Or rather the soil and weather were kind to us. Everybody packed n we were on our way back to bunk. N ya the day ended the nxt at 3am. Doin wat? Supposed to b cleaning our dirty arms bt i was nibbling on nitesnacks and sipping coffee the whole time. About 9 hours? Approx. Anyway the field camp was over. I was relieved. Hell was over. Hell 2 wld b qt long away, i think.

Today was the comms parade fer our senior wing. I relly muz commission fer my family. I wana make them proud fer once n stop letting them down time n agn. The pride n joy can onli b lived once in a lifetime. Pls juz lemme commission. My knee hurts frm falling into a lot of shellscraps. Hope tat doesnt weigh mi down, literally. Just came back frm chatting wif my fren. Oh well, it seems tat all of us has regrets in life due to saying wat they were afraid to. I hope i wldnt hav these regrets anymore. He suggested i shld change my date. A screwed-up guy gettin a screwed-up date. Perfect. Jus perfect huh.

2007-09-01T00:15:00.000+08:00

Today was wing cohesion day. I forced myself to wake up frm bed so that at least i cld play a couple of games before heading out to URA centre. Phew it was a rather close shave s i rushed frm my house to URA centre bfore the timing given. I was nearly late which wld mean being confined fer half an hour during the nxt bk out. Ah heck, my nxt bkout is gona b nxt sat nite dude...n bking in on sunday nite. Like relly cool huh. I cld n may prolly confine myself in camp afterall. Haiz my last nite at home alrdy. After tat 6 whole nites in marsiling forests. Tml sispec crossovers are arriving in my wing n one of frens is coming. Sadly he came to the wrong wing, at the wrong time. Platoon field camp wld b their first activity lol. I hope n pray that i relly can get thru this platoon field camp said once by one of the seniors s one of the worst days of his life. Omg, tat sounds relly bad bt i guess theres more to the meaning of worst than juz covered in mud and soil thru out the day n nt being able to bathe. 3 wks to social nite. N i aint relly lookin forward to it. How i wish tat any gal i know well enuf cld juz b my date. Oh well. I guess i juz a loser. L-L-L-oser. Thats wat i joke abt pple in camp. Looks like its time fer retribution. Come on, come and get mi. Im yours fer the taking....

2007-08-31T02:11:00.000+08:00

Had a rather busy week in terms of drill rehearsals. The unfortunate news of an OCS officer's death during AHM sent OCS into a mini-frenzy s we had to settle funeral stuff. Bt the funeral went on smoothly and we paid our last respects to a v valiant officer. His funeral reminded mi tat of my grandmother. I nearly teared during sm parts of the funeral s i tot abt my grandmother when she was alive. A v great example she set fer her relatives both young and old and her sudden departure left everyone of us saddened wif grief. Watever i promise u grandma, i will try my best to achieve it. 10th wk is over fer my service. The nxt bk in wld include meeting of the SISPEC crossovers and of course the most wonderful platoon field camp which will last 6 days. N i've found a date in the worst way possible fer my social nite. Whether i will enjoy tat relly remains to b seen. Seriously i guess i muz hav stepped on many gals' toes in my previous lives fer mi to hav so much entanglement wif them in my current one. Juz recently my date-to-be(DTB) scolded mi ungentlemanly, tactless/ful(which ever is the negative one), insincere and prolly sm other negative stuff. Cooool. I think i will end up on social nite bringing a date there n lasting the nite w/o one. What a successful socialite i will prove to b. Perhaps i fail in tat aspect of an officer cadet. Earlier in the day, one of my platoon mates commented (i dunnoe if he meant it or nt bt he prolly was) tat i had the best temper in the world. Oh well, i guess my ego gt the beta of mi when i felt tat my DTB kept putting mi down. Lastly she gave mi a final surprise when she told mi tat a few other clzmates of mine were watching our convo. Wow. Thanks. I guess I'm relly looking forward to social nite fer the wrong reasons nw. Was she relly the gal whom i did a science project wif? Oh ya she added i was hopeless. Yea perhaps. Hopeless enuf fer my standards n prolly others too. Hopeless, ungentlemanly, tactless and insincere. Thats mi. Hi.

2007-08-26T15:10:00.000+08:00

Army half marathon. Came back 3 hrs ago. Ran 12km. Wa v lots of pple sia, esp army de. Saw qt a few of my frens. V heart-warming sia c them agn after so long. Even saw one of my seniors and he was dam shocked tat i was in ocs. Zzz. I so noob meh. A bit nia ma zzz. Wa seriously if i dun end up in arty after service term then siao liaoz. My fren's cousin told him tat my training nw is qt tough de or the toughest. Zzz. It beta b lar cause i cannot imagine hw much tougher it can b. 12 km v long sia. Ran fer 1 hr plus plus. Haiz my fren didnt make it fer PTI selection cause he didnt swim well. Wat a waste lar. If onli there was officer PTI, i confirm go fer the selection de lor zz. Ouch my left knee is hurting slightly nw after the run. Orh man relly relly hope i dun go out of course due to injury sia. Then when i changed to my civilian clothes after the run my platoon mates were like 'wow-ing'. zzz. One said it was matching ie my clothes n shoes. Lol n i hadnt put on my cap. Oh well. Went thru dressing-up lessons the hard way liaoz. N my fren in bmt ask mi whether goin kopitiam in tat or nt lol. Ok private joke. Nxt wk's platoon field camp liaoz. 6 days. Omg im gona complain n complain till its over. N when it is, heh song liaoz. Haiz bking in tonite liaoz. Sianz leh...

2007-08-25T15:01:00.000+08:00

End of 9th wk. End of patrol field camp. Phew, i pulled thru, luckily. Training in rain outfield has almost become a formality fer mi. Wet uniforms mixed wif sweat, mud n rain is definitely nt gd fer sensitive skin s i hav found out the hard way. I hav also passed down my appointment s cadet platoon commander. Obviously i lived up to my instructors expectations tat i m an absolute failure. Nxt wk is platoon field camp liaoz. 6 days. Worst days of my life s wat a senior feedback to us in the canteen. Oh well. Tats juz relly cool fer mi. Hopefully there is an error smhw in the training schedule and it is supposed to b shorter instead. Ok i noe, wishful thinking. Bt tats wat kips mi goin on. Oya theres gona b a change of command in ocs wif the commander of ocs stepping down liaoz. Then theres this parade to pay our gratitude to him and guess wat im one of the lucky 66 of my wing. Zzz. Rehearsals in the hot sun nt onli burn ur boots bt ur brains s well nt to mention sunburnts. No wonder parades seldom consisted of females. Monday is the actual one wif last practices on tat morning. Yawnz. If i relly dun gt to arty during pro term i think i will juz die out in infantry. Oh well, lets hope my instructors noe where to put mi to. Heh. N no more nites at home. Zzz. Confined fer army half marathon. Organised punishment. Hw coincidental. Oh well. A matter of gettin used to. Feels great to b commissioning. I guess i juz hav to wait n endure fer 6 more mths plus plus if i wan to even gt a whiff of it. Wa...1.5hrs the actual parade wif 3 wks of practice. I hope i can make my bros n parents proud of mi. I relly hope so.

2007-08-19T14:02:00.001+08:00

8th wk done. 6 more to go till the end of service term. Darn this wk is v unlucky. First on thursday n friday we had live firing n outfield training and it rained exactly bfore we started. How coincidental. Splash splash. Mud n water soaked our uniforms s thou they were juz washed in the washing machine of the rain topped up wif detergent consisting of sand mud and nt forgetting slices of nice smelling grass. Nice. Anyway, was amazed i got over it. Platoon training i was the exercise pc due to my cpc responsibility. More of default anyway. Was amazed at the way my pc guided mi thru the entire exercise patiently. This gave mi the shudders s he juz blasted mi the day bfore. Hopefully it doesnt mean tat he recommended mi fer infantry rather than my desired arty. omg. Last wk of my cpc duty. Phew. Another 2 more days n there will b a change of command. yes. 9th wk consists of patrol field camp where u slp onli fer half an hr? bet missions over 3 days. Rocks. No wonder cadets r paid more. 140 bucks burnt fer social nite event. N 3 xtras if im unable to turn up wif a date. Cool huh. After this wk is done, there is onli the platoon field camp left. 6 days. Cool...Bk in day agn. Getting used to it. Used to being let down agn n agn...

2007-08-08T23:09:00.000+08:00

The end of field camp. The end of the 6th wk. Midway thru the 7th. Lucky fer this national day hol or else my knees gona become nth more than brittle bones. Orh man after the 7km run today bfore bkout it was painful dude. Period. Oh well, guess i gota spend a little cash to buy some protective knee gear. I guess very soon the things i wear and buy is gona out-worth mi. Wait or has it? Oya the 7th wk was the week i was appointed CPC. Cadet Platoon Commander. In layman's terms, Platoon IC. Orh man tat juz adds on to my stress. Physically and mentally. I hope tonite my knees will recover fast or else it wld b a challenge gettin to the nxt bk out wif both my legs carrying mi out of camp. The bad thing abt OCS is tat there aint any time at all fer u to recover frm injuries and stuff. A period of missing lessons and stuff and the nxt thing u noe it u r out of course. Hope i dun get out of course cause of injuries cause tat wld definitely b a pity. Anyway who cares, i'm even deemed a screwed up guy in my platoon. A screwed up officer less wld definitely serve the force well. Mayb i might nt make it to 22nd september, afterall...

2007-07-29T01:02:00.000+08:00

5th wk of ocs completed. SOC is tough man. Totally. Lol, i juz realised im prolly a little below avg in terms of physical fitness in the wing. Then there's the express interest survey to c which do u wan to go to, either infantry or arty. Of course i chose arty. Hopefully i gt in. Darn my instructor kip scolding mi blur, hope tat doesnt dampen my chances. 8 more wks till tat day comes. I would luv to laugh at myself then. Dam it. Oh heck, first i gotta gt pass 3 field camps. First one comin up juz nxt wk. Which is tml to b exact. Back to tekong haha. Navigation n section training. Orh man. Hope it doesnt rain n gt all muddy. My section instructor is becoming nicer to us s in he doesnt punish us much nw. Bt darn he still thinks im blur. Perhaps i m i guess under pressure. One of my section mates had to do extra duty today on a wkend. He misses his gf dearly and sang Kiss Goodbye. Btw he' s a great singer. I felt fer him. I was sure a few others felt the way i did too. Rite nw im listening to the song. Emo song. Even more if u were him. I hope he gts to spend his time well outside. Nxt wk field camp. Argh. Infantry here i continue on. Alrite dude hopefully u r rite. I guess i will juz take things s they come.

2007-07-22T16:52:00.000+08:00

Book in time is approaching. Oh well. Time passes quickly when u bk out bt nt when u bk in. I guess the onli sensible reason is prolly cause u onli bk out fer a day out of seven. My knees seem to b slightly giving mi trouble. This friday's my ippt proper. I gotta gt a gold to buy myself a tic to bkout on time. Otherwise, argh. Section training agn this wed, day and nite. Dunnoe hw its gona b like. On i will go. Never to turn back again. I swear.

2007-07-14T23:46:00.000+08:00

Cool. A day where i prolly used the most vulgarities in my entire life. And all in 15 mins or so. Sometimes i relly dunnoe if its beta to get confined in camp or come back home. Time relly flies. Juz went out fer lunch n i came bak at 6 plus. And tonite's my last nite bfore goin bak to my second home. Argh...both homes juz dun seem the perfect home. Mayb im a problem kid. Mayb im a problem person. Mayb, and prolly, im an s.

I thought it thru n thru fer the past 3 wks. Was i rdy to go thru tough times fer the nxt 9 mths to b who i think i wld like to b? Seeing many gone thru wat awaited mi has given mi motivation yet discouragement. How i wished i had more of my fellow frens to accompany on this long journey. I guess i will juz go on step by step. 22nd september wld b a fun day. I wld like to c hw i wld go past tat day. Feelin sm pain in my knee. One of my frens went out of course ytd due to ankle n knee injuries. Ouch. Short-term goal = 22nd september. No wait. Shorter-term goal = to bkout everytime i can and b confinement-free. If i ever bcome a commander in the future, i swear wif my life, they will nt suffer like i did yet b s well trained s i wld like them to b. To lead, to excel, to overcome. That is mi, hopefully.

2007-07-13T22:13:00.000+08:00

Alas. Its tough. Wat a huge culture shock, in a bad sense that is. Facing the floor fer abt an average of a hundred times a day has becoming a daily occurence in our curriculum. Regimentation my name, punishment my game. It doesnt help tat i hav one of the most strict instructors in the wing. My life juz gets b-a-tter and b-a-tter. Oh well. 3 wks. 9 more mths. Cool huh. So there my new nick. 2 more days and back to school. Bkouts on saturdays and sundays onli. No more friday ones. I juz hav to get use to it huh. Mr. President, I will c u on the parade square come next year.

2007-06-23T00:06:00.000+08:00

Darn it. I relly wan a scholarship. I dun care if its the worse of the worse bt s long s it helps mi clear my tuition fees tats gd enuf fer mi. Dam. Looks like im worst than even the worse of the worse. Posted to a new vocation. New pple. New places. New sufferings. Ouch. Capped off wif a 3 wk confinement. Im gona miss my clz bbq n miss teasing my teacher whom is said to b goin. Orh man...Oh well. 3 wks of "fun"...then 8 plus more mths of "more fun". Ole. Hip hip hurray. My eyes pls open big n wide. Lots r waited to b learnt, and seen. This shld b my last post fer the nxt 9 mths...lest i gt to bkout n feel bored which i've heard is highly impossible. So there. Tml n sunday shld b busy days fer mi esp tml. Sunday is my last nite home. Enjoy, mi. Zzz.

2007-06-22T00:37:00.000+08:00

Passed out frm BMT le. As I advance to the nxt stage of my military lifestyle nxt wk, I've realised I've learnt many things. Its true fren its true, in army, u sure will learn new stuff, no doubt out of it.

2007-04-11T23:39:00.000+08:00

Tml wld b my enlistment day. The start of a 2yr journey of no-return...ok lar not-so-many-returns. I'm smiling as im typing this. Gleefully and sarcastically. Now fer the serious and emo part. Let me now return to the realm of destiny where i belong. To all out there i will b there if u nid mi, and shall return upon serving my roles. Of which i shall nw declare, this diary of mine shall remain in the depths of heart, nvr opened till...the time is right. Z.z.z.

2007-04-10T23:37:00.000+08:00

Today was the second rd of interview. Today i felt like a complete loser. Correction i WAS a complete loser. That explains y so many pple call mi noob or loser zzz. Raffles rocks seriously. If i were to rethink my choice fer junior college i wld probably consider raffles seriously. If it was 2 yrs back raffles wld b a big no-no. Nw i think its a big wrong-wrong to leave it out of the picture altogether. Anyway if i make it to the nxt rd of the interview, any readers of blog can feel free to rob mi of a meal ANYWHERE. That's hw confident i m of nt making it cool huh. Oh well, comforted mi my parents did but ultimately i feel as though im still in a different league from the elite out there, one that is lower obviously. Anyway that aside, tml is my last supposed day as a civilian for the nxt 2 yrs or so to come. I think im physically prepared bt nt mentally. Nw i understand y my fren said that to mi nt too long ago. Goin to the army fer 2 wks w/o any contact with the outside world. Hmm...i think im definitely gona miss my home n pple, a lot. Oh well, i guess that's life s an nsman. I guess im probably not gona post any entry tml or fer the nxt 2 wks or so. Thus i guess this is wat i hav to say to u, my fren.

F inding exactly the right words to say,
A lthough it will probably end up to nay.
R endering my service to the nation,
E nduring the sometimes inedible ration.
W elling up i think r tears in my eyes,
E xuding they flow as i will miss your cries.
L ooking out for you i can no longer do,
L ove yourself more please that wld b juz cool.

2007-04-06T01:26:00.000+08:00

Whoo...the water is becoming more and more like home to mi! Mayb being a merman wld b cool, being surrounded by mermaids wld b even cooler heh... Its 1.28am nw. Pardon mi if i use nonsensical language. Today went swimming again. Now i think everytime i go swimming i dun swim breaststroke le, swimming freestyle seems more pro and looks more pro. Btw, i think breaststroke relly helps u develop breasts lar, ok i mean improve ur chest muscles. Ok then went mac wif fren to drink drink rest rest. Cause i nvr bring my hp and wallet everytime i go swimming de so i onli brought a few coins. Then i wanted to order the 1 dollar coke under everyday savers. Zzz in the end the coke costs 1.5o or smth. So no more bubble tea fer mi le. Actually rather have bubble tea but my fren wanted to eat dinner. Zzz. Waste my money. Then went home lo. The end. Tml goin to play soccer in WOODLANDS in the morn then goin gym in the afternoon. Walau dam packed sia. I think this is the most i've ever exercised in a very very long time liaoz. I feel fit haha. But feeling n being fit r 2 different things...zzz. Sian i hav to find out a time to slot in my lunch before goin gym. Then after tat hav to rush to orchard mrt at 130. Walau the gym my fren say dam high clz lar still gt sauna also. Juz like my father's club de lol. I tat club at all although i hav the membership. Cause in raffles n i dun like there lar. Onli all the rich pple go nia. But over there dam gd the bathing facilities. Wa tired liaoz beta slp le. If nt tml cnfm cannot reach woodlands in time. Dam long journey. 1 hr like tat. zzz. Feeling bad is one thing, being bad is another. Heh, juz jk nia lar. Dun think so much lar. After all, this is wat My Fate spells...

2007-04-05T12:39:00.000+08:00

Let's start wif ytd. Whoa ytd earlier in the morn hav to crawl up frm bed to go chinese gardens mrt. Then while waiting fer one more fren we went to chi gardens to walk walk. But reach the entrance liaoz then tired so we juz rest there. Wa the pond dam lots of fishes lar and also gt tortoise, or turtles, aiya dunnoe lar. After that we walked to jurong east swimming complex there. Then realised the baby playgrd under renovation. Then we go lazy river first, then sit slide, then go swim then go wave pool then the sequence dunnoe liaoz. Then i tot my fren to swim but still quite unsuccessful. Aiya i suck at being a coach lar. Anyway tio sunburnt think because of tat. Then my goggles went loose. Then realised one component dropped smwhere. Siao liaoz. Then i fixed back le quite tight. When i was forcing it over my eyes the bridge snapped. ZZZ. The third pair of goggles i destroyed...cool. Beta nt tell my mum or she will kill mi. After tat swam 200 metres w/o goggles. Wa i think nxt time i swim w/o goggles le lar. Although cannot c v clearly and will make my eyes swollen but beta than destroying another goggles. Ex leh zzz.. Then when in the wave pool i touch the ball-ball thing haha which is the barrier u cannot cross lar. Then my fren say if i can touch the rock which is beyond the barrier treat mi rice. Zzz...fifty cents nia wan mi to risk my life. Then felt quite sian so i decided to do smth diff. XD I went underwater and lifted both my fren's legs n slammed him into dunnoe which pt of the pool. COOL! Then he was dam surprised n immed came to get his revenge...Of course i gt away. Dam it lar then ltr they come gang mi. zzz. In the end dunnoe somersaulted hw many times and hw much water my mouth, nose and ears drank. Think they dam full liaoz. Then hav a bit of headache. In the end hav to act like i drowning then they stop. Zzz then tried to backstab someone but failed cause he struggled like siao n anyhow punch n kik. So muz protect ourselves n our body organs...the important ones...zzz. Oya then they also tried to rape mi lar. Shout qiang jian so loud still no strangers come help mi... Luckily i use one hand hold my trunks man, if nt...i hav to stay in wave pool ferever liaoz. Wa then tio sunburnt, sian diao, put sunblock still tio, dunnoe wat lousy sunblock my mum gimme. Then here comes the fun pt. Juz s we were goin to take our things to bathe then my fren realised he lost his locker key. LOL! C lar kip slamming and raping mi until liddat. Haha in the end helped to find le but still cannot. Then hav to pay 8 bucks to open zzz. Ltr go kfc eat. Then go wif fren back to my hse downstairs make specs fer army. SUPER nice sia the specs...aiya heck lar...no choice also zzz. Today hav been in front of the com since morn. Die liaoz lar my presentation fer second interview haven even prepare yet. Zzz...smtimes i take things fer granted man... Think mayb i go fer a swim, again, since im feeling so bored. Yalor becomin fish liaoz...i think i can c scales on my body and a tiny tail growing. Walau my skin dam red lar. Zzz... a poem then i go eat lunch...abt wat? U'll c.

Friend or foe I know not who,
As u approach I move back too.
Time a game u play the best,
Even bad ones u find it a fest.
,

Finding me to play with you,
Albeit a mismatch which was long due.
Trying again as you forced me,
Excellence only belonged to thee.
,

Wincing in pain as i left your game,
Hounding me it did like it was my name.
Y do you twist me now all the same.
?

2007-04-03T23:22:00.000+08:00

Today was the first day i felt bored nt wrking in a very long time. Then i decided to go swimming at 4 plus. Think i swam onli half an hr zzz. Then quite tired le haha. Tml goin to jurong east to swim, again. Ok lar nt swim is to play more. A fair face hides a foul heart. Vice-versa too. I for one prefer to read into one's behaviour to gauge the person's character. More often than not, I get it rite on the first try. Wait mayb i didn't really noe the truth so i THOUGHT i gt it rite. Anyway, i find tat i n my sec sch frens r drifting apart during each of the times we hang out. Perhaps we r relly so gd frens until there isnt relly any new stuff to talk abt. Or mayb we ARE drifting, apart. Reality sucks huh. I guess mayb its because of army. Oh well, enuf of tat i guess. Now's its time fer my date wif a vampire. Wait nt MY date. Its the show name. Cya then.